One guess as to how Jack Kingston would vote on this.

For years, we SEC fans have had good reason to believe that South Carolina fans are the most delusional folks in the conference. In their minds, the Gamecocks always have the best coaches, the next Heisman Trophy candidate, more advantageous scheduling than their rivals and better talent on the bench than the kids they had starting the prior season. Never mind that reality tells a vastly different story.

It’s even better than that for Georgia fans since Spurrier arrived in Columbia. ‘Cock fans have been crowing loudly for the past two years about how Spurrier “owns” Georgia. There’s nothing like living vicariously through another school’s accomplishments, especially when your school under the Ol’ Ball Coach is 0 for 2 (and who got shut out for the first time in almost 20 years, to boot) against the ownee.

But this sad thing takes it all to a new level:

A HOUSE RESOLUTION

TO CONGRATULATE UNIVERSITY OF SOUTH CAROLINA HEAD FOOTBALL COACH STEVE SPURRIER AND THE UNIVERSITY OF SOUTH CAROLINA FOOTBALL TEAM FOR AN OUTSTANDING 2006 SEASON WHICH CONCLUDED WITH A TOTAL OF EIGHT WINS INCLUDING A VICTORY OVER HOUSTON IN THE LIBERTY BOWL, IN MEMPHIS, AND FOR BRINGING TO THE GAMECOCK PROGRAM A RENEWED SENSE OF PRIDE AND ACCOMPLISHMENT.

Whereas, under the direction of Head Coach Steve Spurrier, the University of South Carolina football team recently concluded an outstanding 2006 season with eight wins including a thrilling high-scoring victory over Houston in the Liberty Bowl in Memphis; and

Whereas, as a quarterback for the University of Florida, Coach Spurrier won the Heisman Trophy in 1966, which symbolizes the best collegiate player for that year; and

Whereas, in 1983, he first became a head coach for Tampa Bay of the USFL and in 1987 began his college coaching career as a head coach at Duke University winning the ACC title before he moved on to Florida in 1990, where he won six outright SEC titles and one national championship; and

Whereas, in his first season at Carolina, Coach Spurrier led the Gamecocks to a 7-5 record and a second place finish in the SEC Eastern Division. For this accomplishment, he was honored as the SEC Coach of the Year by the Associated Press; and

Whereas, as the University of South Carolina’s thirty-second head coach, he has inspired the Gamecock players, alumni, fans, and supporters to believe that any football goal is possible to achieve through hard work, team work, and perseverance and the performance of the 2006 team gives evidence to this; and

Whereas, as a result of two excellent years under Coach Spurrier, the Gamecocks 2007 recruiting class is ranked by most analysts in the top ten nationally, and by some, in the top five nationally which should help make the Gamecocks a strong force in the Southeastern Conference for many years to come; and

Whereas, perhaps the biggest attribute Coach Spurrier brings to South Carolina is his reputation as a coach of integrity, who follows the rules while at the same time expecting his team to compete to the very best of its ability on the field; and

Whereas, the members of the House of Representatives, by this resolution, would like to congratulate Steve Spurrier and his University of South Carolina football team on its great 2006 season and thank Coach Spurrier and his players for bringing wonderful credit and recognition not only upon themselves, but upon their university and State as well. Now, therefore,

Be it resolved by the House of Representatives:

That the members of the House of Representatives of the State of South Carolina congratulate University of South Carolina Head Football Coach Steve Spurrier and the University of South Carolina football team for an outstanding 2006 season which concluded with a total of eight wins including a victory over Houston in the Liberty Bowl, in Memphis, and for bringing to the Gamecock program a renewed sense of pride and accomplishment.

Be it further resolved that a copy of this resolution be presented to University of South Carolina Head Football Coach Steve Spurrier.

Yep, that’s South Carolina House Bill 3708, honoring Steven Orr Spurrier for, among other things:

  • winning eight games and the Liberty Bowl in 2006
  • winning seven games in 2005
  • winning conference titles at Duke and Florida (!)
  • having a highly ranked recruiting class in 2007

Talk about setting the bar low. Personally, I would have added something about making Stephen Garcia get a haircut. At least that’s a matter of significance that actually occurred in Columbia.

If South Carolina wins nine games in ’07, I have a win-win proposition for you honorable members of the House: vote to remove the Confederate flag that flies on the state capitol grounds and replace it with a flag bearing the mug of the Evil Genius. Even when Spur Dog leaves, you’ll have gotten the NAACP off your backs. It’s the gift that keeps on giving.

(h/t DawgsOnline)

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