Kiffin watch: “That’s a lovely dress you’re wearing, Mrs. Cleaver.”

Jesus, can the Laner possibly get more unctious?

Asked about Meyer’s comments, Kiffin chose his words carefully:

“I’d say this. This offseason the (SEC) commissioner (Mike Slive) made a big deal about our renewal of vows about what we’re supposed to say about other teams, other coaches, other players.

“Obviously, Urban feels he doesn’t need to follow that. I won’t say anything else.’’

Asked if he’d ever say an opponent didn’t play to win, Kiffin said, “No, I would never say that.’’

He’s college football’s Eddie Haskell.

… He was known for his neat grooming — hiding his shallow and sneaky character. Typically, Eddie would greet his friends’ parents with overdone, good manners and often a compliment such as, “That’s a lovely dress you’re wearing, Mrs. Cleaver.” However, when no parents were around, Eddie was always up to no good — either conniving with his friends, or picking on Wally’s younger brother Beaver. Eddie’s two-faced style was also typified by his efforts to curry favor by trying to talk to adults at the level he thought they would respect, such as referring to their children as Theodore (Beaver’s much-disliked given name) and Wallace, even though the parents called them Beaver and Wally.

Portrait of a coach as a young man?

Eddie Haskell with a goatee?

Eddie Haskell with a goatee?

To Junior’s credit, the two-faced stuff was pretty good, though.

… Kiffin did say something else, though, indirectly taking a swipe at Meyer.

Meyer said a flu outbreak among several key players adversely affected Florida’s performance against UT.

Asked if he was concerned about flu striking Tennessee, Kiffin said:

“I don’t know. I guess we’ll wait and see, and after we’re not excited about our performance, we’ll tell you that everybody was sick.’’

By the way, is Kiffin going to draw Mike Slive’s wrath for mentioning Corch Meyers by name?  Stay tuned.

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31 Comments

Filed under Don't Mess With Lane Kiffin, SEC Football, Urban Meyer Points and Stares

31 responses to “Kiffin watch: “That’s a lovely dress you’re wearing, Mrs. Cleaver.”

  1. John

    Kiffy is a clown, but I like the shot at Corch Meyers about the flu thing.

  2. Bobby Fenton

    “I don’t know. I guess we’ll wait and see, and after we’re not excited about our performance, we’ll tell you that everybody was sick.’’

    This makes Kiffin sound really stupid. Um, coach, you’re 1-2. The loss to UCLA, in particular, was deplorable. Why are you still “waiting” to be unexcited about a performance. It looks as though you’ve had ample opportunity so far.

    I could definitely see Tennessee winning 16-20 against Georgia, or getting a huge win against Alabama 10-28.

    He’s all yours, UT. What a f–kstick.

  3. Bulldog Bry

    I don’t know, Senator. I’m with Kiffin on this one. How is it that CUM gets away with every d-bag comment or move and nothing ever happens to him? I’m gonna bet that there were several SEC coaches that secretly applauded Kiffin’s jab.

    • Bobby Fenton

      What has Meyer gotten away with?

      • Hogbody Spradlin

        The problem with Meyer is not digs at other coaches or programs.

        Meyer’s problem is that he is thin skinned, egotistical, and has no warmth. I can’t forget the Jevan Snead thing (we’re only recruiting Tim Tebow as a linebacker). He wrote in his book that the endzone celebration was a big thing. That’s petty. After last year’s Georgia game he said the time outs were to get a scrub more playing time. Please.

        He’s a great coach. Bernard Law Montgomery was a great general too, but a repulsive person.

        We all want our coaches to be gentlemanly killers, al la Bear Bryant, but maybe those days are gone.

      • Bulldog Bry

        While I’ll admit, he’s not gotten away with “violations” (that we know of), my point is that how come Slive never comes down hard on him? Comments directed at Ron Zook about previous atmosphere, swearing out revenge for an endzone celebration in a book, saying another team wasn’t playing to win, etc. To be sure, none of these are life and death, but if Slive wants everyone to get along and play nice, why doesn’t he start with the one person who loves to get under everyone’s skin?

    • You really think Kiffin was playing to win last Saturday?

      I’m not saying that if I were Meyer I would have said it out loud, but he’s not wrong.

      • Bobby Fenton

        Oh no, I completely agree with you that Kiffin was not trying to win. In fact, I think he knew that wasn’t possible, so he at least wanted to be in position to be able to make exactly the type of backhanded (and not so backhanded) digs that he’s making.

        And Meyer was commenting directly on the football game and the strategy involved. Like you, I’m not sure if I would’ve said it out loud either, but he was giving an answer to a legitimate football question.

        But Bulldog Bry asked how Meyer gets away with “every d-bag comment or move”? I’m saying, what are all these things Meyer has said and done?

      • He’s not wrong, but I’d say it’s below the head coach of the presumed greatest team evah to insinuate that had it not been for the flu or for Kiffin playing not to lose they would have really put the hammer to them. You think that just because Kiffin was playing keep away that Meyer didn’t intend to run the score up on him? I don’t for a second. I think he’s making excuses for his players just having a bad game, but it comes across as petty.

      • Bulldog Bry

        I think Kiffin knew he couldn’t out-score them in the air.

        And no, decent people wouldn’t have said what Meyer said out loud. But it was the ONLY payback he could get. Then I think Kiffin said, “Fine. I’ll play your war of words.”

        Meyer’s not really known for being a gracious loser.

  4. BenG

    It’s really not polite to make fun of mentally challenged people.

  5. The Realist

    Kiffin was the hand he was dealt. He couldn’t play to win. There was no winning to be had. He doesn’t have a quarterback with a functioning throwing arm/brain. A 10-point loss where you held your own is a win when everyone and their brother picked you to lose by 30+.

    This was the most disappointing win for any team since Georgia beat UAB by 3. I remember everyone feeling like their team had just lost after that one. Maybe it was the flu.

    • Your post made me think – what is a win other than the UAB game you mentioned where it felt like UGA lost?

      I thought about the 1999 Central FL game won by UGA 24-23. UGA had no business winning that game….and if Central FL had ANY kind of kicker, they would have left Athens w/ a ‘W’. I think I remember them missing 3 field goals and an extra point….plus they had the ball on like the 10 yard line w/ a chance to win at the end, but instead of kicking a FG (and missing AGAIN), they chose to pass…which was broken up in the endzone.

      I left the stadium feeling sick because UGA had to steal a game from freakin’ Central FL at home.

      • On the Bright Side

        Beating a rival by 10 points, however sloppy, is not even comparable to nearly dropping a game to a lowly non-conference team. For UF, there have been a couple of games againt Vandy that have been way more unsatisfying than this past Saturday. I especially enjoy that Kiffen’s PR driven strategy of keeping the game close may backfire in the sense that he’s now defending his strategy to roll over and play dead.

        • But when UGA almost lost of Central FL, we were an average team at best (finishing 8-4). We weren’t close to Florida’s level and probably weren’t even ranked at the time….but we DEFINITELY weren’t #1.

          I understand your point and agree about any win over a conference rival being good, but still……the game had to be a little unsatisfying and showed a few flaws with your team (lacking Harvin’, etc).

  6. Hogbody Spradlin

    Florida must take retribution against Lane Kiffin. He has stained the Meyers name.

  7. Hogbody Spradlin

    Blutarsky: how’d you come up with ‘unctuous’, a synonym for ass kissing? I could be taking out of context, but the first part of the quote above sounds like garden variety finger pointing.

    • You don’t think he was kissing Mike Slive’s ass there? Sure sounded like it to me.

      Of course, the rich irony there is that Junior was the reason for Slive’s rule in the first place.

  8. D.N. Nation

    Would these two mind shutting their yappers? Adults are talking.

  9. Dog in Fla

    Lane exhibits extraordinary use of The Wit of the Staircase v. Urban- it is the answer you cannot make, the pattern you cannot complete until aterwards it suddenly comes to you when it is too late.

    Today’s Word–esprit d’escalier

    esprit d’escalier (e-SPREE des-kal-i-YE) noun, also esprit de l’escalier

    Thinking of a witty remark too late; hindsight wit or afterwit. Also such a remark.

    [From French esprit de l'escalier, from esprit (wit) + escalier (stairs).]

    “We’re all witty. It’s just that many of us think of our clever remarks a bit too late. The French call it the staircase wit, indicating that one thought of that perfect retort on his or her way out.”

    “I can think of hard, tough, one-line put-downs, but only after the person concerned has left the room. (NB: this affliction, esprit de l’escalier, is one of the principal reasons why people become writers.)” Simon Barnes; Glitzy Game Gets Line Not Length All Wrong; The Times (London, UK); Jun 13, 2003.

    For this season’s it is what is example please see
    http://www.dickipedia.org/dick.php?title=The_Flu

  10. Frank

    Meyer was NOT wrong. Eddie Haskel is chronically wrong, it appears.

    You can make lemons out of lemonade.

    You can make orange juice out oranges.

    But, you can not make sense out of Kiffy’s mouth.

  11. Ben Rockwell

    Anyone who thinks that Urbs is beloved in the media should take a listen to the ESPNU college football podcast from last Friday before the game.

    Maisel said he’s never seen anyone hold a grudge like Urbs; he and Chris Low both agree that his tactics with calling those time outs in JAX last year were “bush league”; and they both said that was something you do in HS football, not major college football.

    It seemed to me both of them have had a little too much of Urb’s attitude, and I’m sure it’s getting a bit prickly with most coaches as well. Just an interesting listen, if you’ve got a few minutes.

  12. GatorKGB

    Interesting analogy, and on the right track.

    Eddie Haskell, like a politician, was obsequious for a purpose; curry favor with Ward and June so they wouldn’t interfere with his sneaky schemes. June was buffaloed, Ward was not. And, of course, when Haskell’s schemes unraveled, he was typically falsely repentant.

    So, when you realize that examine Haskell’s behaviors more closely, they bear a startling resemblance to a modern politician.

    Lane Quitten’ is no more than a modern politician.

    They are never wrong, never make mistakes and each unintended consequence or result is explained as a victory of some sort or another.

    Quitten’ proved it from 6:01 of the 4th quarter on. Down by 10, he doesn’t try to win the game.

    As opposed to esprit d’escalier, he appears to have been preparing his spin-speech in the middle of the 4th quarter.

    The amusing thing is that the media is buying it, even though UF had more total offense than in 2008, UT had less total offense than 2008, UF had more yards passing than 2008, UF had more yards per carry than 2008, UF had more yards rushing than 2008, UF had a higher completion percentage than 2008, UF threw the ball more than 2008.

    What UF didn’t have was a punt return for a TD by B. James and what UF did have was an avoidable red zone fumble.

    If Slive gets involved here, it should be to sanction Quitten’ for violating the most basic tenets of sports….try to win, leave it on the field. In money sports, there are always political elements in play, but those fade away when the game begins….except with Lane Quitten’.

    What would Vince Lombardi say?

  13. BigOldDawg

    Yo…Hogbody….great comparison to Montgomery…not that anybody but you and me know who he was.

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  15. Xon

    I don’t buy this theory that UT wasn’t playing to win. Running the ball is their only viable game plan. Running the ball actually moves the ball on occasion. Throwing the ball results almost immediately in a punt or disaster. Granted, there’s more time left on the clock after the punt or disaster, but I don’t think that’s a good trade.

    Corch said it in his own jabby comments. He didn’t open up his offense becasue “if we throw an interception, we might lose.” So, in other words, UT was using a game plan that had Florida thinking about the possibility of losing? In other words, UT was trying to put themselves in a position to win.

    There is no “crush the Gators” gameplan out there. Stay close by shortening the game with lots of ball control and hoping the dominant favorite makes some mistakes to help you out is standard, underdog strategy. It IS playing to win when you are an underdog.

    I’m genuinely puzzled by this entire discussion…

  16. keith

    I love it that Kiffen had something clever to say back at Meyer. The most ridiculous comment by Meyer was, We are trying to impress the pollsters.

    Yeah right, so just what are you doing when you are up by 40 in the 3rd and Tebow is still playing.?

    I didn’t hear anything about UF players being sick BEFORE the game. Its just an excuse because everybody expected UF to cover the spread.

    Douchebag

  17. keith

    Meant to say aren’t trying to impress the pollsters. Man there really needs to be an edit button on here.