Derek Dooley condones underage drinking.

Just kidding.

In case you didn’t follow Tennessee’s game against Middle Tennessee last Saturday – and, let’s be honest, who did? – you may not be aware of the dicey situation Dooley faced with his kickers (h/t Graham Watson).

… The game ball went to Derrick Brodus. [Michael] Palardy was hurt. He hurt himself Thursday after practice, but we thought he could be fine. He couldn’t go. [Chip] Rhome went out there before the game and pulls a muscle so we didn’t have a kicker so we had to make a call to the frat house. This is no lie. We called the frat house and had a policeman go get him and he goes out there, suits up and nails three PATs and afield goal. He got the game ball. I was proud of him. Great story. I’m going to write a book one day about the things that happened to me over the years. I had to find a kicker out of a frat. I didn’t know what we were going to do. Just when I think it has all happened to me, we are going out to pregame without a kicker.”

Hmm… frat house.  What does Dooley think redshirt freshmen kids do with their time at the frat on a Saturday during football season?

“He [Rhome] went out there like the kickers do before pregame and they all come back in a panic. I said `let’s get an APB out on Brodus.’ It’s a good thing he wasn’t having too much fun on a Saturday afternoon. I told the coaches, `Hey — an intoxicated Brodus is better than nobody. Get him. Just get him here. Give him a breathalyzer.’ Fortunately he didn’t do anything bad.”

If Brodus had been drinking, do you think Knoxville’s finest would have waited to cite him until after the game?

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29 Comments

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29 responses to “Derek Dooley condones underage drinking.

  1. Wouldn’t that cost him 10% of the season? ;-)

  2. Cousin Eddie

    That is truely to funny. One of those thing that should be filed under D–n if I’d told that. “Give him a breathalyzer.” So far the funniest quote of the season, to me anyway. At what point would they said “No”. If he was below the legal limit but had alcohol in his system could he kick?
    If that was Auburn would they have just brought someone from the NFL in?

    • gastr1

      I must say, Dooley and his staff are going to replace Houston Nuttster quite well. The honesty and absurd (unintended) humor has developed into a pattern up there in KnoxVegas.

    • Cojones

      Yeah, but the breathalyzer wasn’t given until after the game and before the celebration. Great story. If I were Dooley, I also would tell them to keep him away from the coaches and turn your head when he speaks. I’d let him blow thru a tube attached to the football before putting it into play. Hell, I’d hand him another beer at the final buzzer.

  3. Dawg Vent

    Opportunity is nowhere.

    And, Fire Mark Richt!!!!11

    • Cojones

      I still laugh every time I see the picture of that poster in my mind. What a hilarious goof!

      Opportunity is nowhere….. except in the frat house. Go Greeks!!

  4. Ubiquitous GA Alum

    Luckily he wasn’t exiting an alley on a scooter with a stolen helment while failing to recall his middle name …. or in Athens

    • HVL Dawg

      Police escort to the game….. I don’t think the university police at UGA would lift a finger on game day for such a problemo.

  5. Gravidy

    That, ladies and gentlemen, is the difference in how the local police handle things in Knoxville versus Athens.

  6. Brandon

    That is freaking awesome.

    • Cosmic Dawg

      I was trying to put my thoughts into words…that IS freaking awesome.

    • Cojones

      Certainly is worth a movie where everyone gets sex with adoring recruiting girls( left over from the Kiffin mini-era) in the frat house later.

  7. Go Dawgs!

    Underage Tennessee football players kicking footballs while intoxicated is better than underage Tennessee football players kicking the heads of offduty Knoxville police officers while intoxicated, so I’d mark this down as progress.

  8. Dog in Fla

    BOLO for a kicker at a frat house – “It seemed like a bad idea at the time.”

  9. Dude, Barbara is about to go all Golum up in here. She don’t like folks talking bad about her Precious.

  10. Bryant Denny

    Paging Otis Mounds

  11. Will Trane

    Way to go Coach Dooley. Timing is everything. You have to like Coach “Double D”. He is a very good coach [and staff, plus team...getting there]; the type of coach players like; and good for the SEC East.

    A great day in SEC history and football. Like Gundy @ OSU said, another football Saturday of “march madness”. College football…the best sport and the best ticket in American sports.

  12. Mayor of Dawgtown

    I condoned underage drinking, too, at least when I did it when I was underage.

    • Cosmic Dawg

      The age is totally arbitrary. It’s how any of us, young or old, handle the stuff, right Mayor?

      • Mayor of Dawgtown

        The ironic thing is that I handled it better then than I do now. Back then I could drink all night and not get drunk. Now, 3 drinks and I am looking for a place to go to sleep.

    • Cojones

      Yeah, Mayor and it was training for our overage.

  13. Hobnail_Boot

    If you watch the post-game presser, it sounds like Brodus’s drug of choice is not alcohol, brah.

  14. I wanna Red Cup

    I bet Brodus said he is never drinking again