You know, when life throws you a fastball down the middle, you’ve got to turn on the sucker. So, I think you guys need to answer a question Butch Jones has this morning:
His sales pitch to the 2014 kids? “I think there are a number of things but my main thing is: Why not Tennessee?”
Please – be brutally honest.
Why not Tennessee? I got an offer from Vanderbilt.
Because I still have all of my teeth and wouldn’t fit in.
Why not Tennessee? Because teeth are optional.
“Maybe.You guys still on that whole ‘shower everyday’ thing?”
Why not Tennessee? I hear Lulu is back on the market.
Why not Tennessee? I got an offer from ITT Technical School.
“Because I also have been offered by Southwestern New Mexico State Junior College”
Why not Tennessee? Why not jump off a bridge?
Because gonorrhea is a bitch.
Because I wish they all could beat California.
Yo yo yo yo yo yo. Trojans.
Well why not, Tennessee???
Because opportunity is nowhere
Because here, we don’t talk about getting back to the Peach Bowl. Wait…
Because of this…
http://www.opiniononsports.com/2011/10/tennessee-nike-pro-combat-uniforms.html
I don’t care who you are, that’s funny right there.
dang funny.
What other college lets you throw beer bottles as you please?
Because here, they’re always willing to give you an 11th chance.
There is neither enough time nor bandwidth to list all of the reasons.
Like the man said, nothing sucks like a big orange.
Why Tennesee?!? Where else will you find Stomp-A-Cop Tuesdays at the local bars?!?
Why not Tennessee? If you’re from out of state with a room temperature IQ, when you get here, it will raise the average IQ of your old state AND Tennessee!
why not a kick in the nuts?
Why not Tennessee? Because Nashville Auto & Diesel is kick ass!
Because buttchugging.
Proper shower ettiquette is enough for me.
No hose left behind
Why do they keep scrubbing the hose scene in the Shindler’s List of science fiction? It serves a legacy to SOD’s hygiene program, which history may regard as his greatest achievement except for his buy-out
http://www.denofgeek.com/movies/battlefield-earth/22556/10-remarkable-things-about-battlefield-earth
Because where I come from people that wear orange are picking up litter on the side of the road
Why not Tennessee? Because they needed a bigger Butch.
http://gamedayr.com/gamedayr/fox-fails-in-epic-fashion-claims-tennessee-has-hired-butch-davis-photo/
Because I don’t drink with my butt hole.
Are you a married woman? Or is it that you just don’t drink with your significant other?
Because my hostess has filed a paternity suit!
This Bama student makes a pretty good argument:
This was seen as an improvement over the first attempt to develop a recruiting pitch:
Tennessee? Not!
nowhere