The reason God created the mute button

Thanks, WWL.

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24 Comments

Filed under ESPN Is The Devil

24 responses to “The reason God created the mute button

  1. Will

    I’M ALREADY NOT WATCHING!

  2. Nate Dawg

    I actually like Tes calling games. He can make even San Jose St vs BYU sound good for us junkies. Figures the Four Letter would pull him off games (if that is the case). The rest, especially 2 of the 3, unlike the Four Letter, I can certainly live without.

    • Tim Rankine

      Ugh, Tes is awful…or awesome at ruining telecasts. Part Musberger, part Gus Johnson.

    • Russ

      Tessitore is fine by me, and I don’t know the LSU guy. Tebow and F-bomb make me want to shove chopsticks into my ears.

  3. I bet the ratings will be pretty dismal for this show especially as the season drags on. Do we really have any desire for another morning pre-game show? I’d rather watch Gameday. At least Corso keeps things interesting.

  4. uglydawg

    Meanwhile, up in heaven the loud speakers are turned up…A gravely and masculine voice is saying, “All right now, get the picture..Clemson on the far side all decked out in new white pants and jerseys with orange..that awful orange lettering. White helmets with awful orange chinstraps..they’re all jumping up and down like they want to beat somebody. And on the other side, here’s Georgia all bunched up in a tight circle around Mason and Gurley. Red jerseys and silver britches and red helmets with the big old G on them..Man it’s hot…now the Dawgs are breaking the circle and the recieving team is going on the field..Marshall and Gurley are standing on about the five yard line..now they move a little deeper….” Up in heaven.! Enjoy it all you Dawg lovers who are up there with LM!

  5. W Cobb Dawg

    I miss Jefferson Pilot.

  6. Cojones

    Wonder which position the two in the middle played? The one on the right is large enough to play any position he wants. The one on the left? FU.

  7. AusDawg85

    Thought this was a contest: “Who doesn’t belong in this picture?” No matter who you say, you are correct.

  8. Anon

    There is nothing about this that makes me want to watch it.

  9. Jeff Sanchez

    Wait, the GPOOE isn’t on a pro team this fall? How can that be?

    Must be the War Against Christianity.

  10. Don’t forget Brent Mousebooger. They also loved us enough to give us Brent Mousebooger.

  11. South FL Dawg

    Mute is for commercials during a Georgia game my friend. Unfortunately too, because I’d rather be in the stands at Sanford, but the point is my TV doesn’t get turned on for pregames.

    It’s rather pathetic how Tebow threw away his chance at playing by insisting on a position in a league that didn’t want him for that. Some team player and some competitor he turned out to be. At least the other turds look like they would have heatstroke if they walked on the field.

    • Hackerdog

      He really didn’t have much of a choice. A 235 lb guy who runs a 4.7 40 isn’t going to be in demand as an athlete. Realistically, he could play fullback or tight end. And he would have to be taught how to play both positions. The NFL is devaluing fullbacks to the point that teams don’t even have to draft the best ones out of college. They can sign them as undrafted free agents for little money. And tight end is a difficult position to learn. Tebow could end up as a decent tight end. But how many teams are willing to pay first round money and deal with the media circus on a project tight end? Answer is, none.

  12. I guess that they aren’t coming to Athens on Labor Day weekend means it’s still possible College Gameday could be in Athens.

  13. Mayor

    This proves you don’t really need to have any talent to get a job in television.

  14. Cojones

    Does ESPN realize that they are getting into bed with a virgin? What’s ESPN going to do when he confesses nationally to getting laid the night before his surprise wedding announcement? If he has a shit-eating grin on his face when he confesses, then I might start warming up to him.

  15. 69Dawg

    This show will be the closest we come to a football hell on earth. Awful just awful.

  16. Senator, do you have an Instagram tag?