Son, fat, drunk and stupid…

is no way to go through death:

… A University of Maryland researcher reported last fall that the number of male patients who turn up at emergency rooms drops markedly just before a televised sports event and surges immediately after. Dr. David Jerrard found such visits jumped 30 to 40 percent after a Major League Baseball game, 50 percent after an NFL game and 75 percent after a Division I college football broadcast. [Emphasis added.] His theory: Men who need medical attention during a big game often try to gut it out until they know the final score. And when are most big games televised? On the weekend.

Talk about a perfect storm: adrenaline, stress, procrastination, testosterone and, more often than not, alcohol conspire to make you sick and stupid at the same time. You get to the emergency room later than you should, only to find there aren’t enough doctors on duty to deal with the post-game emergency room rush. Uh oh…

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