Kiffin watch: send in the clowns.

Not much else you can say in response to this Q & A with Gator lineman Matt Patchan:

What would you say to Tennessee coach Lane Kiffin if you passed him on the street?

I probably wouldn’t say anything to him. I’ve got nothing to say to that guy. He’s a bozo.

(h/t Chris Low)


Filed under Don't Mess With Lane Kiffin

13 responses to “Kiffin watch: send in the clowns.

  1. RedCrake

    If that kid played for Georgia, Stacy Searles would have his foot so far up his ass.


    • On the Bright Side

      before or after storming the field to celebrate first quarter tds?


      • RedCrake

        Actually….its kind of a moot point….because if that kid was a Georgia O-Lineman, he wouldn’t have been talking to the media in the first place and if for some reason he was, he sure as hell would know better than to say something like that.


  2. RedCrake

    And by the way…saying he’s a bozo is saying something.

    Typical Gator retard.


  3. Dog in Fla

    Global War on Lane (GWOL) Crisis of the Day (COD) Piece, 12 August 2009:

    Dollywood, East Tennessee –

    1430: Lane relaxing on an exquisite chaise lounge with two big humps specifically designed for and by Dolly herself down by the poolside hears from Layla Two who calls in today’s intel report to him. Lane is taking his usual Wednesday R ‘n R day off.

    This is what the pool boy hears from Lane’s side of the phone conversation after delivering another mint julep:

    “He called me a what?
    What’s that mean?
    Like the big shoes person in a circus or at birthday party?
    Who is this Patchan guy?
    He’s not from Pahokee is he?
    If he is, that’s a direct violation of my Peace Treaty with the mayor.
    He wouldn’t talk to me if we passed on the street?
    Not even to say hello?
    You think that he does not like me?
    Okay, okay, you don’t have get mad about repeating yourself.
    Do you think that if Eric Berry would do another billboard with me not dressed as a clown, would that help?
    Eric doesn’t want to deal with me right now?
    Why not?
    Because Eric thinks I go to Dollywood too much and leave all the team prep to him?
    Has Eric ever been to Dollywood?
    If he had, he would understand why I like it here so much.
    Where’s Daddy?
    You don’t know?
    I told you to keep a better eye on Daddy after we captured him and returned him from being MIA.
    He’s not trying to escape by climbing a fence again is he?
    He would have been gone again had he not fell off backwards giving us a chance to recapture him before he split.
    No one has seen Daddy?
    Where’s Coach O?
    Back in the organic chemisty lab?
    Doesn’t O remember that he and I were banned from all chem labs after that last little incident concocting Love Potion #9 for catching a QB?
    Where’s Lane?
    In Memphis?
    For what?
    What about Eddie?
    He’s on vacation in Pahokee?
    Well, somebody’s got to do it. Glad its not me.
    Is there anybody there?
    Head Coach Pat Summit?
    She wants me to report to her office?
    Right now?
    Where’s Hamilton? I want him to buy me some time.
    Nobody knows where Hamilton is?
    He was last seen climbing over a fence and running off?
    To where?
    Nobody knows?
    Layla One doesn’t know where I am, right?
    Good. Let’s keep it that way. A man needs a little privacy every now and then.
    Remind me when I get back to have the grounds crew put razor wire on all fences around the perimeter.

    Pool boy, bring me another mint julep in a go cup and call my pilot and tell him to fire up the helo chop chop. I’ve got to head back to the Green Zone and take care of a little Master Plan business.”


  4. I'd love to see TN beat FL

    “Dog in Fla” needs a jobby-job.

    And I would very much love to see TN whip FL in Gainesville.

    Would love it.

    Ain’t gonna happen though.

    Patchen is a typical gator douche with an asshole arrogant gator attitude.

    Stupid punk kid.


    • Dog in Fla

      I’d love:

      Does that mean nobody is going to pay me for this?
      I thought I was going to get paid.
      Dang, like my Daddy told me, guess I have to get haircut and get a real job.

      I’d like Tennessee v. Florida to be a 3-2 Auburn v. Mississippi State-like score because after that one last year, each of the coaches got fired and can now look for another job although Tommy doesn’t need one because of the Auburn Cash for Clunkers program.

      It doesn’t say that about Patchen in his bio. He looks like a perfectly normal guy although he probably could stand to have someone shape his mullet a little better.


  5. Jax Dawg

    They say Offensive Linemen are some of the most intelligent football players.

    After reading the entire Patchen interview, I must say he is an exception to the rule.

    Very unimpressive.


  6. RedCrake

    My favorite part of the interview?

    If it wasn’t for football, I wouldn’t be in college. It would be tough and a waste of time.

    That is what I call the top 1% of the top 1%.


    • JasonC

      He seems like an ass, but I know we were recruiting him too, but he looks like he made the right decision and found the best environment for him.


      • RedCrake

        I don’t so much have a problem with him feeling that way (I’m sure lots of college football players do)…I’m more concerned with being stupid enough to say it in an interview and/or coaches allowing him to even do interviews knowing that he is just that stupid.


        • Eh, Pollack says crap like that all the time on his afternoon radio show in Atlanta. I can also attest to Pollack not exactly being a star student as he was in one of my history classes and let’s just say his abilities in the classroom paled in comparison to his abilities on the field.


        • look redcrake shut up. my problem with dog fans like you is you are always bitching cause florida is always whipping us. also kiffin is a bozo, we all know it. i admire him for saying what everyone is feeling in the SEC. Lets face it kiffin will run the vols into the ground before he does any good for that program. hes already pissed off Urban, Steve spurrier, les miles, nick saban and mark richt. and the will all pound him not just next year but the next couple years.