I sit behind the visitors’ sideline, so I can’t believe I missed this. (h/t EDSBS)
Way to feed into that stereotype, fellas.
I wonder if that GA thought his job description would include “washroom attendant”.
Filed under Gene Chizik Is The Chiznit
Auburn’s team is in the shitter anyway.
Chizik to former walk-on QB at Iowa State: “Son, are you still interested in a G.A. position here with the University of Auburn?”
Farm boy: “Absolutely.”
Chizik: “Great, I have got an innovative new position waiting for you. You will be holding the key for the thing that is going to transform college football.”
Hilarious.. I saw them walking that out of the stadium a the end of the game and wondered what it was.
“My Left Foot” – a Bama fan’s approach to Nick Saban.
A Bama fan with an inquiring mind wants to approach Nick, the Bama fan having recently heard of the new not-so-secret secret weapon Chizik has, the ASS (Auburn Sideline Sh!tter), a school colored Middle Eastern inspired casbah-like vertically shrouded portable, and what Nick was going to do about the Auburns having an unfair advantage of extra bathroom breaks other than those available at half-time.
In the end, the ASS really didn’t help Auburn too much against Georgia once, after the second quarter started, Georgia not only remembered it was in a game, it discovered for the first time this year that it had a running game and Joe Fifth Year Senior Moses Cox unbeknownst to him or Bobo finally mistakenly discovered Israel with its lone troop. That discovery was as well-planned as Columbus accidentally running aground somewhere but it worked so God Bless Israel.
Nick was approached on what used to be considered tarmac (new blacktop at the Tuscaloosa Regional/Intergalactic Airstation for spacecraft and crop-dusters) but is now widely known to be and accepted by almost all Alabama fans to be ‘Water’, which approaches the iconicness of that Alabama state pagan symbol of Bear on a Coke bottle and pieces of old toast that look like him eating Golden Flakes.
And no, Nick does not have an orthopaedic shoe on his left foot, those are lifters in a platform shoe for vertical enhancement purposes…wait a minute, it’s his other left… The Bama fan in a voice that is lovely but plaintive calls, “Nick, Nick, you’re walking too fast…You’re out of step…Nick, can you hear me?…Nick? Nick? Nick?”
Nick notices the Bama fan but as he is wont to do because Nick has his Bellichick perpetual game face on, of course, ignores him. The Bama fan smiles still content even while knowing full-well that Bama will lose again to Florida and again to whatever it plays in the Sugar Bowl, and God help us if it’s another mid-major and Orrin freaking Hatch, and says, “Oh, well, maybe Nick doesn’t have time for this sh!t because, I guess, he thinks he’s got other things to do like game-planning on how to destroy Auburn’s ASS.”
“We have a long way to go to get to where we need to go,” Smart said. “That’s nothing to do with Oregon. That’s nothing to do with anybody we play. That’s to do with the Georgia Bulldogs...”-- Kirby Smart, AJ-C, 8/14/22
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