How else can you explain this?
Filed under Because Nothing Sucks Like A Big Orange, Crime and Punishment
Frank Drebin and the Knoxville Police Squad have closed the case.
Victim: It’s a terrible thing that’s happened here, Lieutenant. I do hope you will find the people responsible.
Lt. Frank Drebin: I’m sorry I can’t be more optimistic, Doctor, but we’ve got a long road ahead of us. It’s like having sex. It’s a painstaking and arduous task that seems to go on and on forever, and just when you think things are going your way, nothing happens.
+1 for any Naked Gun reference
Lt. Drebin: Like a midget at a urinal I’ll just have to stay on my toes.
1. He’s our coach.
2. He’s a lawyer.
With due respect to the Senator, T. Kyle King, MaconDawg and seemingly half the sports blogosphere, both statements work just as well as reasons to not trust the man.
The sturdiest phrase in Will’s piece is this one: “Not enough information.” We don’t know who those 7-10 assailants were. We don’t know Derek Dooley’s soul. And we don’t know what consequences, if anything, he’s doling out to the team behind closed doors.
The only thing anyone knows is that when the Vols take the field, some 10% of the guys in orange participated in an episode of epic, near-murderous violence. Were I a Vol partisan in the stands, this would give me pause.
Repaint the situation in red and black. You’re decked out in your Georgia gear and have dropped a few hundred to a grand to bring your family to the game, plus whatever your Hartman contribution was. One of our safeties hammers an Arkansas running back to make a critical stop on 4th and short to ice the game. Praise rains down on him from the 93,000-seat stadium. And then a voice in your head pipes up: “Was he one of the guys who nearly caved in that cop’s skull?” Maybe not, but you know that whoever the assailant was, he’s suited up somewhere on that hallowed field. At that point, does it matter if you trust Mark Richt?
I dunno. Maybe I’m getting old.
Ehhh. They are Vols. We know that. ‘Nuff said, imo.
As I’ve said before, I don’t see much difference between DD and Kiffin. Somebody prove me wrong. And what’s all this baloney about DD being a lawyer? He’s a coach who has a law degree. The UT press write about him as if he were Bobby Lee Cook.
The “incident” is “unfortunate”?
7-10 players beating a man nearly “dead or brain-dead” and placing a police officer in ICU for a fractured skull is not “unfortunate”.
It’s a damn crime and a felony at that.
Derek needs a Jackie Chiles to be his Huntley Johnson
The fact is Dooley was a working attorney when he decided to become a coach. He knows that the police can not sort out a mess involving 7-10 suspects when the suspects are teammates. He feels that he is under no obligation to tell the police anything he has found from his interviews with the players so he is being the type of lawyer we all love, screw whats morally right I’m going to protect my client even if he is guilty as sin. When Dooley didn’t immediately suspend the whole group until it was sorted out, I lost all respect for him as a coach. When he finally suspends two players that the police did not mention, that was an admission by Dooley that these were the bad actors in this case. When he reinstates them before practice starts I lost all respect for him as a person. Precious is just another smooth talking snake oil selling Houston Nutt in my book.
I think you insulted Houston Nutt with that reference, not the other way around.
Most interesting part of the article is how did Rogers not get suspended for half of the season with his arrest and resisting arrest?
It will be renamed from the ‘Fulmer’ Cup to the ‘Dooley’ Cup in short order at this rate.
The Precious is dead to me. Run up the score.
Not if Jackie Chiles is on the case.
Subscribe in a reader
Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.
Join 2,088 other followers