War Eagle Whine

Shorter Track Em Tigers:  don’t hate us ’cause we’re pretty.


Filed under Auburn's Cast of Thousands

80 responses to “War Eagle Whine

  1. Spike

    Wow. That should be some kind of record for self pity and self flattery at the same time.

  2. TennesseeDawg

    Those poor wholesome Tigerettes have been sullied by jealous bloggers. Whoa is them.

  3. HVL Dawg

    Don’t bother to mention that Aubie had its great season because of ONE player. And that player is so creepy you wouldn’t want to shake his hand.

    • Go Dawgs!

      But… but… he’s got such a great smile!

    • WarD Eagle

      Onterrio McCalebb & Phillip Lutzenkirchen each scored again while you were typing “ONE player”.

      And, you forgot to whine about Nick Fairly knocking the crap out of your precious little snowflake QB.

      • Biggus Rickus

        Yeah, McCalebb’s success obviously had nothing to do with the defense overplaying Newton. And Lutzenkirchen truly was scary with his 2 catches for 31 yards (passes thrown by Newton).

        And who can blame Fairley for spearing him in the back and making a dive at his knee? Certainly not me. That’s just football. Right? You didn’t say ‘butthurt’ so I guess that’s an improvement.

        • WarD Eagle

          “Yeah, McCalebb’s success obviously had nothing to do with the defense overplaying Newton. And Lutzenkirchen truly was scary with his 2 catches for 31 yards (passes thrown by Newton).”

          TDs win football games.

          “And who can blame Fairley for …making a dive at his knee?”

          Awww…you’re so cute.

          • Biggus Rickus

            “TDs win football games” is pretty deep for an Auburn fan.

            • 81Dog

              stay tuned for his next bits of deathless insight: Water is wet! Air lets you breathe! 180,000 grand is cheap for a national title!

            • Will (The Other One)

              I mean it shows proper spelling and is pretty much a complete sentence, so we all know James Brooks would have trouble following along…

      • AusDawg85

        Probation U won a championship and can’t get any respect…how sad.

      • WarD Smeagol

        me precious…me precious…

        • X-Dawg

          +1000 LOL!

        • WarD Eagle

          me bitches….me bitches…

          • Puffdawg

            We’ll happily be your bitches if it means winning 4 out of every 5 times. Nice win last season. We were starting to confuse you guys with Georgia Tech.

            • 81Dog

              it’s easy to tell the difference. Tech fans are the ones with mustard gear, high scores on the SAT math section, and an inferiority complex when anyone says “UGA.” Auburn fans are the ones with orange gear, low scores on all parts of the SAT, and an inferiority complex when anyone says, “Alabama,” UGA,” “LSU,” “ethics,” “cheap shots,” “payoffs,” or basically anything other than the most brain dead greeting in sports, “War Eagle.”

              Auburn fans are Tech fans without the scholastics, or the big city sophistication. Doesnt Tech still have more SEC football titles that Auburn?

            • WarD Eagle

              Hey everyone! Let’s play selective statistics!

              Even a dog with a misshapen head can figure out that 50/50 isn’t the same as 1/5.

      • Noonan

        Auburn football will never win anything of significance without the taint of cheating. The sad thing is that despite the sleaziness, rulebreaking, and win-at-all costs mentality, you will never approach the level of success which the University of Alabama has achieved. Congrats on your National Championship. Now you can go back to being that other school in Alabama.

        • WarD Eagle



          • Yurdle

            Oh, I seem to have forgotten UGA’s record against Auburn in the last five years. Can you remind me? My google machine is busted.

            • WarD Eagle

              Apparently, 5 years is a favorite statistical periods for public barkers.

              So, let’s look at some 5 year periods in the rivalry.

              2006-2010 UGA 4-1 Woot! Greatest Team Ever BAYBEE!1
              2001-2005 AU – 3-2
              1996-2000 AU 3-2
              1990-1995 Even 2-2-1
              1986-1990 AU 3-2
              1981-1985 AU 3-2
              1976-1980 Even 2-2-1
              1971-1975 AU 3-2

              Uh…you guys are dominant.

              • Biggus Rickus

                Well, it’s the only five-year period you listed where there was any real separation.

      • Ridley

        Are you seriously endorsing Fairley’s cheap shots against AM? Or just trolling again? Fairley’s actions were tasteless and disgraceful. Any respectable football fan would develop a serious case of indigestion trying to defend such unsportsmanlike conduct. You and your fellow barners, however, relish it. And you wonder why you don’t receive the respect of other programs. Talk about a lack of self awareness.

        • Puffdawg

          My favorite part fo that article was the first comment “…Auburn fans should continue to show the class that we expect.”


          • WarD Eagle

            The editor must have stricken, “…by not barking in restaurants.”

            • retwely

              I’m sorry you didn’t get in to UGA. Take solace in the fact that most of the other Auburn students from Georgia didn’t either.

              • 81Dog

                when he got into Auburn, rather than UGA, he allowed the average IQ at both schools to rise. With any luck, AU’s will hit room termperature any year now.

              • WarD Eagle

                Haha…the nerd argument.

                I didn’t apply to UGA. I don’t bark in public.

        • Dog in Fla

          “Fairley’s actions were tasteless and disgraceful.”

          Shocked and chagrined at Fairley’s actions, Jackie Chiles was mortified and stupefied that we kept letting him terrorize our QB.

        • WarD Eagle

          You think we give a damn about the respect of a bunch of whiners?

          You guys are still whining about everything AU. Half the posts on this blog are:

          – Somebody poor-mouthed Richt
          – Somebody poor-mouthed UGA
          – GT
          – AU

          And, every one of you chime in like a gospel choir, “waaaahh”.

          Man up.

          • Ridley

            Uhm, did you read the article referenced above? And you accuse others of whining?

            “[I]t’s hard to argue against the drive-by journalism aimed Auburn’s way.
            The source of this deep undercurrent remains a mystery.
            Is it orchestrated by those who wear crimson? Does some of it come from Athens or Baton Rouge?”

            It’s actually worse, delusional whining while pointing fingers at others for noticing that you won with a mercenary and a cheap shot artist as your two best players.

            Why don’t you man up, stop trolling, and start using some reason in your posts. Otherwise you do nothing but further solidify AU’s hard won reputation as a bunch of cheats and liars.

          • Hogbody Spradlin

            You must give a damn. You’re here schmuck.

          • retwely

            Actually I definitely do think you give a damn. You’ve come to a UGA blog, and commented about a dozen times on this posting. So yes, you certainly do give a damn.

            Sorry we beat yalls ass four of the last five and I’m more than willing to place a wager we do it again this year. Let me know if you are interested.

  4. Spence

    The Auburn fan is like what would happen if you took away a Tech fan’s dungeon and dragon set, replaced it with a Club magazine, a can of Grizzly, and a trucker hat, and gave that fan a taste of some success on a football field.

  5. Lrgk9

    When o’ When does the Yahoo Sports investigative staff travel to the cow pasture school w/o a lake?

  6. “Cam Newton coolness”………almost sounds like a Lexicon entry. 🙂

  7. Biggus Rickus

    I can’t speak to Alabama people’s feelings, since they’re as crazy as Auburn fans. I feel pretty confident saying the rest of the conference hates Auburn because they obviously cheated, and Cam didn’t get the athlete of the year award because most people suspect his dad was paid and Cam probably knew about it. When his season at Auburn is ultimately vacated, the conference won’t have to strip him of an award as well.

    Also, if he really believes Auburn is going to “dominate” college football nationally on a regular basis he’s fucking crazy. Of course, based on other posts of his I’ve read, I suspected he was crazy anway.

  8. Hogbody Spradlin

    The guy at Track Em Tigers manages to pack conceit, hubris, an inferiority complex, and a chip on the shoulder into the same column. Sounds kind of like a Tech fan after the 2008 game.

  9. Go Dawgs!

    Auburn has become the “it” program for high schoolers across the country?

    That’s a special kind of delusion. But, I guess delusion and paranoia go hand-in-hand. Incidentally, the reason Cam Newton wasn’t selected as the SEC’s male athlete of the year didn’t have anything to do with alarm bells about the coming era of Auburn’s dominance, slick, it’s because the people who vote on the award didn’t want to give it to a guy that we’re all certain was ineligible during his conquest.

    • Puffdawg

      That was what I first noticed as well. “Auburn has become the “it” program for high schoolers across the country?” Really? Has the author BEEN to Auburn, AL? That they are the supposed “it” program SCREAMS of impropriety.

      • The ATH

        He’s probably just pointing to silly little things like their number one recruiting class last year…

        There’s a lot of ridiculousness in that article, but there’s no questioning their ability to (somehow) get kids to the Plains.

        • BeerMoney

          Troopa knows how to roll $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$.

        • Puffdawg


          Thanks for reiterating my point.

          • Puffdawg

            I feel like should add to my comment to clarify. When kids all of a sudden start to get rabid about going to some random podunk place with a coach who has one winning season ever on his resume and who is surrounded in controversy, kids entrenched in places which bleed the local school colors (like the kids from Louisiana), something stinks. What does auburn have to offer that has all these kids so excited?

  10. Doug

    I’ve got enough good Auburn friends that I’m loath to make any sweeping pronouncements about their fan base, but even with that in mind, posts like that make me wonder if War Eagle Nation hasn’t been the most defensive bunch of national-title winners since the BCS started. Even USC fans weren’t that het up when it became clear the fix was in with Reggie Bush; they just basically yelled “Come on, MFer, is that all you got?!?” and waited for the NCAA hammer to drop.

  11. Dog in Fla

    I’ve got enough Auburn friends and relatives too. But who can resist –
    “Instead of defending these innocent girls, Finebaum stood by and allowed his army of ignorant callers to phone the program and make accusations and insinuations against these young ladies in relation to their hostess duties….To think that a national radio host could stand by and let these young girls have their reputations trashed and still keep his job is incomprehensible.”

    This article defending the honor of sullied innocent Tigerette hostessettes doing their bootilicious duty is reminiscent of the days way back yonder when Col. Angus comes home to the Plantation on the Plains

    • Bad M

      How bad do you have to be to make Finebaum look like the sane one?

      • Dog in Fla

        Real bad

        “something tells me she has a bigger penis than every guy in that store”

    • Hogbody Spradlin

      There’s a commenter over there at Coulter’s editorial who expresses outrage at the Tigerette schtick, and he goes by Col. Angus. Something wrong there?

      • Dog in Fla

        Hey, that makes me look as if I’m Casey Anthony ass-guilty of stealing the idea from the commenter with the temerity to call himself Col. Angus. But I’m not guilty. I’m as innocent as any one of those sweet, White and soft Tigerettes, I swear to you. I got down to the quote in the article and it made me think primarily of antebellum times, and secondarily that the author was obviously hot for a Tigerette or two or three, so I cut and pasted that portion of the article and searched out the SNL video for posting here. I read no further. I swear to you on the stack of Confederate paper money that I got with the family Bible that I r-u-n-n-o-f-t with from one of my many no-count relatives who first stole the Bible with the cache of money from my dead granddaddy’s house in Conecuh County before I could get there first and do it. Why did I not go back and read the rest of the article and get to the comments? Because in between my posts here, “I dust a bit…in addition, I am at the moment writing a lengthy indictment against our century. When my brain begins to reel from my literary labors, I make an occasional cheese dip.”* Also, I forgot what I was doing.

        *.”A Confederacy of Dunces” – John Kennedy Toole

        While it certainly would be easy to steal a quote from a dead man without attribution, it’s generally regarded as bad karma to do so just like the bad karma I hope gets visited upon those assholes who finagle a handicap parking rearview mirror tag from a doctor thereby taking up all the close spaces while having no disability whatsoever. Whenever I see that happening, and my gut tells me when that is so, I go into my Verbal Kint limp to try to make them feel bad. So far that hasn’t worked yet but I know it will someday just like when someday we’ll be whipping Florida’s ass again just like we used to do.

        • Hogbody Spradlin

          Fla. No problem. I googled Col. Angus after i saw your post and the other guy’s screen name. The phrase is flip about sex. My comment above is about the irony that the yutz is offended at jokes about the hostesses while he uses a screen name that slights women.

          Also: Casey Anthony is as innocent as the driven snow. Everybody knows that.

  12. Russ

    Auburn’s the new “it” program? Didn’t their team graduate/use up their “eligibility” last season? I see a string of 8-5 seasons on plains.

  13. Not as short version: “Why is it we spend years making up ludicrous conspiracy theories and no one listens, but one player’s dad confesses to cheating …”

  14. JaxDawg

    Auburn is a strange little animal. Kind of like a dog with wings. Too fat to fly and too stupid to tuck his wings and use its legs. Either way, it’s always been an outcast.

    • WarD Eagle


      You chose a stupid fat dog as an metaphor?


      • mwo

        Haven’t you got a home to go invade or some cammie cam juice to drink?

        • 81Dog

          really. AU: 2010 BCS title, 2011 Fulmer Cup title.

          AU is so far ahead on points they probably should rename the Fulmer Cup. It’s like Bob Beamon’s long jump in Mexico City; it will be decades before another school approaches that level of criminality.

          the amazing thing to me is none of the points even came from Nick Fairley.

      • Athens Townie

        Would you prefer “student with low standardized test scores and drinking problem”?

      • JaxDawg

        Well, Ward…I would have used cow or pig but those are too obvious.

  15. Mayor of Dawgtown

    Actually, there are some things Coulter said that are correct. Auburn DID supplant Bama as the dominate program in the state of Alabama since the retirement and death of Paul Bryant. It’s convenient for some to forget that Auburn beat Bama 6 years in a row, then lost twice, then won last year. That’s 7 wins for Auburn over Bama in the last 9 games.

    • George Glass

      I dunno.

      Bama has 2 Natties and a house of horrors of coaching decisions while Auburn has one nattie & a TV blackout with far less coaching turmoil (though they’ve had their share of it too).

  16. Scott W.

    Smug pricks can’t even enjoy their NC. Pity them.

  17. Biggus Rickus

    Holy shit, you guys. Check out this comment:

    “Maybe because what Chizik has established is special and maybe, just maybe, Auburn people are right when they say it’s the most friendly of the bunch and it’s so special. There is something about Auburn that is special. If you’re not an Auburn person, you’ll never get it. If you only knew what’s going on at UA right now. Don’t be surprised if you see another dog fighting scandal come out with UA.”

    I just don’t know what to say. I haven’t seen a Georgia blog’s comment section devolve into a message board comment thread like that.