Seems àpropos, no? A few simple, yet obvious rules to follow:
- Every time Verne mentions that Will Muschamp is a former Bulldog, take a drink.
- Every time Verne mentions Muschamp’s effort to clean up his language, take a drink.
- Every time CBS catches Muschamp losing his temper on the sidelines, take a drink.
- Every time Muschamp loses his temper over being a former Bulldog, take two drinks.
- Take a drink every time Mark Richt’s hot seat is mentioned.
- Take a drink every time a reference is made to that seat being cooled by the five-game winning streak.
- If Gary says Richt’s seat is hot again by the end of the game, finish the bottle.
- If Gary says Georgia is still in the driver’s seat to win the East by the end of the game, finish the bottle. Then get another one.
- If Verne calls the trip to Atlanta to play the best team in the country Georgia’s consolation prize, give him the finger and finish the second bottle.
- Take a drink every time Todd Grantham is called “fiery”.
- If CBS shows the clip of Grantham giving the choke sign in last year’s game, take a drink, gargle and swallow.
- If Muschamp and Grantham get into a post game rumble, take a drink and then break the bottle over the head of the person nearest to you.
- Take a drink if John Jenkins gets mentioned in the same comment with Terrence Cody.
- Take as many drinks as you need when the conversation turns to the Alabama-LSU game.
- Take a drink every time 3-18 is brought up.
- Pour everyone a drink if Gary or Verne mentions it’s now 4-18. (Cigars are optional.)
Get The Picture 
Where’s the Tebow mention drink? Or maybe that would cause alcohol poisoning.
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Every time Tebow is mentioned, take a swig, swish and spit at the TV.
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He wouldn’t approve.
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I would have gone with the alcohol poisoning route, cause you know they’ll talk about him, and how he’s just a winner because he beat the Dolphins Sunday at least 1,000 times.
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Everytime Tebow is mentioned make a joke about the quality of third world circumcisions to the man next to you or express general disdain for crying at sporting events, finish your soliliquy by shouting God bless! and then of course, take a drink.
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And the unreformed and non-believers would be summarily struck blind and visited by the Locusts
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You trying to kill us, Senator?
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Lawdy, I’ll be toast by 4:15… 😉
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You left out the most important rule:
Every time “LINDSEY SCOTT” is shown, take a drink.
There will no one sober past the 1st quarter.
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You think they’ll show it that much?
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Yeah, that’s usually just one time.
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They always do
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Or at least to this old Gator, it seems like they always do mention it a lot.
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They should. It was the greatest play in WLOCP history.
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Hell, the goytdang whole game is on the front screen of the offical SEC site!
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Senator,
When you mention bottle; are you referring to liquor or beer?
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Yes.
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In Family Feud style, clapping, “Good Answer!”
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Jeebus Blutarsky, we’re not frat boys anymore! I want to be awake, AND ALIVE, past halftime.
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Where’s your guts, man?
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If we’re going to turn things around down there, it’s going to take extraordinary effort from ordinary men. Man up, Hogbody. I recommend doing some practice drinks with old game tapes this week leading up to Saturday. It’s all about getting meaningful reps.
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Now that sounds like a plan!
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Atta boy. From about Wednesday at 5 pm until Sunday morning, any comments I post are most likely going to be riddled with typos, so y’all just have to forgive me.
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You are too amped up, much like our QB last year in the first qtr. Slow it down GD!
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Pretty funny, GD…
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3 out of the last 21 cocktail parties i’d agree with you.
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Needs more socials and give-aways, but those are easy edits.
I will be using this template.
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Beverage Suggestions From Your Sommelier Hogbody:
With the weather cooling down, a Tommyknocker Imperial Nut Brown ale goes quite nicely with a Georgia touchdown.
For something really hearty, like a head on de-cleater, try a Bell’s Expedition Stout.
And finally, to celebrate the win by getting blasted, or to mourn the loss by getting blasted, a Founders Old Curmudgeon American Ale. It’s about 10% ABV, and it really sneaks up on you.
When Florida does anything good, a warm Natty Lite, only so you’ll have something to piss later.
A Georgia victory, given their rarity, deserves a Padron 1926 as well.
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+1 on the Tommyknocker
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You definittley won’t be partying on my yacht with that kinda talk, sir! 🙂
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Props for the permission (“but, honey, a senator said I HAD to…”) but guess I better load up on God’s own brown liquid (and a helluva lot of morning after coffee and Goody’s). Since variety is the spice of drinking life, anybody got any suggestions for something brand new to supplement my Elmer T Lee and Woodford Reserve and my neighbor’s Knob Creek and Elijah Craig?
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Out of a basic neo-bourbon curiosity, this Elmer T Lee of which you speak, I’ve yet to meet. What is the deal with this concoction? And is it available anywhere north of Virginia (I wonder)?
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Lone: There’s as good a description as any from “Spirits Review” at http://spiritsreview.com/reviews-bourbon-elmer-t-lee.htm. I disagree on one point in the review (tho it may be a matter of taste buds): although it is certainly “full bodied,” I don’t consider it “damn smooth.” In fact, it’s my more complex counterpoint to the very smooth likes of Woodford and good ol’ dependable Maker’s. All, of course, good for initial “snootful” flavor (in fact, here’s a suggestion: put your bourbon glass in the freezer for an hour or more before pouring; when ready to drink, remove immediately, pour, swirl, and when tilting back for that first delicious drink, breath in just before imbibing–then you’ll really know what you’re about to get; recommend MTB’s “Fire on the Mountain” as a soundtrack to the experience).
As far as availability, I now live in New England, and have no trouble finding it at our local Liquor Depot. Sometimes takes a bit of looking at other stores, tho.
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I got drunk just reading the list.
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Now I feel like I’ve already watched the game.
Is it OK to get a head start on this list right now?
For Munson!
For Herschel!
For Scott!
For Stafford kicking Tebow’s butt the very next day! (Even though I’m a Denver fan)
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I’ll be smashed before the game is even underway with those rules.
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Now you talkin my language, man. We stick our feets up them gator tail, we all gone drank — but you disremembered one thang – – we gone vomit too, then drank some mo and cry.
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I’m loaded from just reaging that…
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Are we sure Verne and the gang will be doing the 3:30 and not the 8:00 in Tuscaloosa? Seems doubtful…
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What’s going on at 8:00 in Tuscaloosa? The football team has a bye this Saturday.
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Zing!
Putting up another statue?
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If Ut upsets USCe after we’re done with the Gators, drink a bottle, repeat,……
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With you crazy bunch of drinkers about, I just walked out and chained my beer reefer shut and padlocked. Oh, crap! I didn’t get a beer out first.
This ole taster has come down to Leinenkugels and Newcastles for your volume drinking and you can never go wrong with any Belgium beer. Richert’s Red and a few other Canadian beers also fit the bill.
Remember, the more you drink, the more jobs available to up the brewing.
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Alabama and LSU are going to pound eachother into oblivion for four quarters on November 5th…and the winner gets the consolation prize of having its ass whipped by UGA during the SEC Championship Game.
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+1.
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Ha.
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How bout 2 drinks every time that you hear that Orson Charles and Aaron Murray played on the same high school team …. I think that it’s in the contract.
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Jesus, Geezus, can’t you se we are talking libations here?
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What about the one where Verne mentions David Pollack and David Greene played pee wee football together?
Wrong year maybe.
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