Bobby Petrino’s cell phone gets around.

From the annals of You-Couldn’t-Make-Shit-Like-This-Up-If-You-Tried-To:

… In fits and starts, Petrino exchanged nearly two hundred text and picture messages with a Little Rock cell phone registered to one Alison Melder, whose LinkedIn profile lists her as a senate assistant with the Republican Party of Arkansas.

Melder, 26, graduated from Arkansas-Little Rock with a degree in political science and has worked with the Young Republicans as well as the state GOP; she also worked on Jim Keet’s gubernatorial campaign in 2010. (On Twitter, her bio reads “Go Lakers, Go Hogs, and Go GOP.) But her political work is hardly the first thing that comes up when you search for her name: she did a spot of modeling, at least a few years back. One modeling profile she created four years ago contains a portfolio of bikini and lingerie images, and she seems to be a favorite of The Dirty. She also lists herself as winner of the 2008 Miss Bikini USA and Miss Motorcycle Mania competitions.

So either he was developing an interest in politics, or he was two-timing the woman he was two-timing his wife with.  When the hell did he have time for coaching?

One other set of texts is strange, albeit in a non-sexual context.

It should also be noted that Petrino was sending text messages to the Director of Football Operations at Louisville around the time he had the motorcycle accident, which is odd to say the least.

Whatever that was about, I doubt it was an apology.  Although if I find out he was texting Arthur Blank too, I reserve the right to change my mind.


Filed under Arkansas Is Kind Of A Big Deal

32 responses to “Bobby Petrino’s cell phone gets around.

  1. Spike

    The more this gets stirred, the more it stinks. Stay tuned.


  2. Babyfarts McGeesax

    From what I read this morning that guy was no longer at Louisville and now is apparently in the real estate business, either way to watch this piece of shit’s house of lies come tumbling down has been gratifying to say the least.


  3. DWH

    The schadenfreude I’m experiencing from all this is truly priceless


  4. Dog in Fla

    When you get bored you look for a whole lot of strange. In addition to the eleventy billon dollar wage loss, as additional penance Bobby’s next scheduled managing job is expected to be somewhere in Far East with these guys, instead of a blonde and a bunette, having duty as his accompanists


  5. King Jericho

    “It should also be noted that Petrino was sending text messages to the Director of Football Operations at Louisville around the time he had the motorcycle accident…”

    So they concluded that “texting while cycling” was the cause of the accident? What an arrogant bastard!


  6. AusDawg85

    She’s from Dumb Ass….errrr…Dumas, Arkansas. The comedy just writes itself!

    P.S. Normally, I’d feel sorry for a young kid like this getting dragged into the media spotlight, but something tells me this one is going to spin her 15 minutes of fame into real gold.


  7. Petrino is about as dumb as they come. After replacing Nutt, who was fired / pushed out in part because of an inappropriate relationship discovered through a FOIA request of his cellphone records…

    He has an inappropriate relationship (or two) transcribed on his public cellphone. Common sense is a commodity that is in short supply these days.


    • Heathbar09

      I have a strange feeling that it’s more than two.


      • Slaw Dawg

        I’d bet a month’s pay on it. I’ve thought from the start that his ‘cycle escapade would turn out to be the tip of a large iceberg. He didn’t change who he was between leaving Atlanta and ditching that bike. A guy who lies and 2 times in the public part of his life is likely to be doing the same in the private parts (sorry, couldn’t resist) of his life. When they get done pulling on the string, Playboy may be able to run a special “Girls of Petrino” issue. I’ll say this, though–he seems to have as good an eye for the ladies as he does for calling plays, so that may be an issue worth checking out!


  8. ZeroPointZero

    I’m confused how his face got so jacked up in the wreck. Did he not have a helmet on? Point being if you were cheating on your wife with a 25 year old chick, would you be rolling around town on a motorcycle with all the world to see? Now add to it you’re the most famous man in that small pond of Arkansas. The stupidity is astounding. Even with a helmet on he’d be exposed for the world to see.


  9. Mike

    This is how…


  10. Rebar

    His ego knows no boundaries and his stupidity is right there with his ego


  11. Normaltown Mike

    I wonder if the guy in her facebook foto is a Hog fan?

    Or the girl in this one?


    • Daniel Simpson Day

      She listed the Bible under books and under activities: Arkansas Football and God. You really can’t make this stuff up!


      • Mayor of Dawgtown

        And her favorite TV programs are Fox News, Keeping Up With The Kardashians and 2 CARTOON shows!!! You are so right. You really could not make this stuff up!


  12. Dog in Fla

    In this afternoon’s episode of “Texts in The S-E-C,” will Hillary make a cameo appearance? Will Pork Rind Jimmy or StuckintheMudd, or both, make a demand on KNWA or, or both, for royalties on the phone record FOIA request because it was their idea in the first place?

    Post-episode special features include commentary by an All-Star panel of experts consisting of Houston Nutt, Mike Dubose, Mike Price, Lane Kiffin and Irving Meyers on how to get caught in The S-E-C without even trying and an out-take featuring Kristi Malzahn who would have told Bobby to shut up and text the blonde and the brunette on a backup auxillary phone if he had just asked her, or anyone else, for advice


  13. shane#1

    I hope Bobby has a long life. He keeps me from being the dumbest son of a bitch in the Southeast.


  14. GodoG

    I just looked at the photo gallery. DAYAM! Certainly can’t fault his eyesite. I heard his wife came home and the girl ran out the back. He made an excuse to leave and went around the corner and picked the girl up. His wife got suspicious, followed him and ran them off the road….don’t know if it’s true…but that’s what I had a little hawg tell me…


  15. Cojones

    He should be treated as a textsex addict


  16. Chuck

    I checked out Alison’s web site ( thanks, Senator). FAKE, imo.