Nah, you keep it.

I know it’s puerile to laugh at this, but I can’t help it.

“It was learned that the victim was walking her dog when she was approached by a black male who asked her if he could borrow a pen,” states the affidavit of the Sept. 17 incident. “The victim went into her apartment to get an ink pen and when she came back outside, the black male was (performing a lewd act) in front of her apartment. The black male then asked the victim if she would want the pen back.”

Metoyer is currently not with the football team, as head coach Bob Stoops and wide receivers coach Jay Norvell had both said earlier this month that Metoyer was taking care of personal business off the field.

“Taking care of personal business”?  Isn’t that what got him into trouble in the first place?


Filed under Crime and Punishment

14 responses to “Nah, you keep it.

  1. bob

    Excuse me while I whip this out.


  2. Skeeter

    Must have been a felt tip.


  3. Turd Ferguson

    In fairness, the whole reason he went to OU was for the exposure.


  4. Cousin Eddie

    “Taking care of personal business” STROKE of Genius, you can’t BEAT Stoops you only hope he can contain himself, now he is RUBBING off on his players


  5. uglydawg

    This is remeniscent of the capers of former Okie All American Jack Mehoff.


  6. Dog in Fla

    For the first time in the recorded history of the Barry Switzer OU Catch and Release Program, Big Game drops a receiver for putting it in overdrive and working overtime for taking care of business. Suspicious minds thought he was taking it to the limit by having sticky fingers and getting his ya ya out! He felt the tip (h/t Skeeter on having a hand in a job well-done!) of Big Game’s enormous wrath and was put into exile on main street in Norman where nothing is normal for a beggar’s banquet. He was last spotted with a sign saying give me shelter between odd jobs of being out mending fences and pumping gas with Lane at one of Alshon Jeffrey’s full-service stations.

    Upon hearing that news, Nick said, “I don’t have time for roster management by Bob Stoops. I invented it. Besides, I’ve already got those albums.”

    It was then that Nick’s driver knew exactly what tune to cue up


  7. Watchman

    Well at least OU doesn’t face any threat of NCAA sanctions. No agent involved. He handles himself.


  8. Comin' Down The Track

    Stoops’ statement on Metoyer: “But… but… the SEC does/doesn’t… [whimper, whine]… something, something…” – Associated Press