Steve Patterson, poster boy for what’s wrong

You know, there are plenty of candidates for biggest jerk in college athletics.  We’ve discussed our share of them here, that’s for sure.  But I’m keeping my eye on Texas’ athletic director these days.  Patterson’s always had plenty of potential, but he’s really stepped up his game lately.  I mean, how else do you explain somebody who thinks scheduling a game in Dubai is more important than the rivalry with Texas A&M?

What’s really special about that is Patterson’s not dissing TAMU merely out of a sense of arrogant petulance like DeLoss Dodds did.  Naw, it’s just good bidness.

“There’s a lot of great tradition with Texas A&M. At some point in time, does it make some business sense, some branding sense to play again? I don’t know,” Patterson said. “It’s not at the top of my list. I’m really more focused on how we grow the footprint of the department.”

… Patterson reportedly has expressed interest in playing a nonconference football game in Mexico City. Another possibility Patterson acknowledged Tuesday could be a future sporting event in Dubai, United Arab Emirates.

“We have a lot of folks in the oil and gas industry,” Patterson said. “Houston is the center of the world in terms of the gas industry. A lot of those alums spend time in the Middle East, and Dubai is a place that wants to use sports to help put itself on the map. So we’ll have some conversations, and we’ll see where they lead.”

This, we are assured, “… should be done in a fashion that grows the profile and the interest of the university of a broad scale internationally.”  Because?

This is the distillation of everything that’s sucked about college football in the last decade.  Note the complete absence of the word “fans” in his master plan.  But podnah, Steve Patterson’s gonna do what he can to make sure them oil and gas fellas have a great venue to pursue a couple of Mideast energy deals.  That’s why we love college athletics!

There’s something else missing from Patterson’s inspiring vision.

Patterson says if you want to play pro hoops, go the NBDL. "That's your place if you want to be an employee. This is not your place."

— Mike Finger (@mikefinger) April 1, 2014

Stupid kids.  Don’t you know employees never play in Mexico City?  Leave the bidness to bidnessmen.