The quintessential Tony Barnhart suggestion

Really, it doesn’t get much more Mr. Conventional Wisdom than this.

My only question – and, no, I’m not going to read the linked article – is why bother with naming four others?

25 Comments

Filed under Media Punditry/Foibles

25 responses to “The quintessential Tony Barnhart suggestion

  1. Uglydawg

    I would nominate Mark Richt. He’s got a solid reputation for honesty and backbone.
    Then, whenever there is a problem in the college ranks, we can use the old standby, “Mark Richt has lost control of…” line to show our concern.

    • Nate Dawg

      I’m totally with this suggestion Ugly.
      I’m also good with it being Saban…if it gets him out of coaching.

      • Just Chuck (The Other One)

        If he could hire enough coordinators, he could keep coaching and do this job as well.

    • TXBaller

      Barnhart agrees with this message Ugly…..as he is, and will forever be, a Richt apologist.

  2. Athens Dog

    I also resisted the urge to click the link…………….

  3. Dog in Fla

    There are at least two more logical candidates. Pare them up and they complement each other as Co-commissioners

    Bob Bowlsby

    and Mark Davis

    http://deadspin.com/mark-davis-travels-500-fucking-miles-to-look-like-that-1734022886

  4. Michael

    Of course, he also listed Greg Sankey. What an enormous suck-up. If there is a complete inversion of speaking truth to power, it’s Barnhart.

      • Go Dawgs!

        I took a peak, too. The man actually suggested Mike Tranghese. You know, the guy who presided over the implosion of the Big East Conference. GREAT plan.

      • Macallanlover

        Wow, I didn’t read it but Barnhart has really lost it. His credibility has been sliding for some time now but just how big of a suck-up can you be and still have an audience? I love the SEC as much as anyone but continual praise of Slive, and now his hand-picked replacement, ignores the lack of leadership/vision this conference has had for 15 years. For those who measure success exclusively by the dollars generated, I suppose the SEC looks wonderful during this period, but when I see the wimpy way we have allowed in addressing over signing, lack of consistent discipline policy the schools,adhere to, weakened scheduling for teams with OOC, etc., I see a lack of courage in stepping up the the Tougher issues. As much as I dislike Boss Delany, he has been a better much commish this century, much more worthy of Tony’s adulation. And no, I don’t want that A-Hole running CFB either.

        • PTC DAWG

          SEC has some big OOC games right of the gate this year, more than I can ever remember….that said, I do with they would mandate two power 5 OOC games for every team..but that would cut into the revenue of most everyone a good bit. Home games are where the money is…Power 5 teams are going to want a home/home or a neutral site game.

          • dawgtired

            “SEC has some big OOC games right of the gate this year…”
            That’s right. It should be a good kick-off to the season. The SEC might not fair as well as we expect either…I can’t wait, it’s gonna be good.

            UGA vs NC
            UK vs SoMiss
            Mizzu vs WV
            Bama vs USC
            Aub vs Clemson
            LSU vs Wis
            OleMiss vs FSU
            TAMU vs UCLA

            • dawgtired

              P.S. It’s like bowl games to start the season🙂

              • Uglydawg

                It looks like a tough go. If the SEC loses a lot of these games, we’ll be subjected to the predictable horseshit that ESPN mouths will be spewing about the SEC being down and no longer dominate…never mind that there isn’t another conference that could match eight of it’s teams up against such competition and have a snowball’s chance in hell wiinning more than two or three of them.

                • dawgtired

                  Agreed. ‘They’ can’t wait to elevate the PAC and the B10 and have something negative to say about the SEC. ‘They’ never would sing the praises of the SEC dominance if it didn’t make them look stupid for ignoring it.

                  …and in other games I missed. Arky plays TCU the 2nd week and MissSt plays BYU later in the year.

                  • Dog in Fla

                    “‘They’(ESPN) never would sing the praises of the SEC dominance”

                    I thought ESPN owned The SEC until 2030 (or the Year 2525)

  5. Otto

    Saban should be commissioner…..

  6. Dog in Fla

    @Michael
    May 13, 2016 at 9:41 AM
    “Of course, he also listed Greg Sankey.”

    Because Tony knows where the secret is

  7. Tony’s articles have all the flavor of the ‘Whats happening above your paygrade’ company newsletter written by some pee on who speaks in terms so general that absolutely nothing is said despite the many words that were used.

    Tony, well done sir. Your quota of words meets company expectations and your utilization mark for this month has been met. Please note that your bi monthly payment of xxxx.xx has been deposited and will appear on your bank statement the following business day.

    Sincerely,
    [ insert SEC Commissioner stamped signature here]

  8. Dylan Dreyer's Booty

    Surprised he didn’t include PAAWWWWWWL. Or maybe he did; I didn’t click.

    • Dog in Fla

      Logic dictates that Tony’s quintessential posse consists of Nick, Paul and an additional three knuckleheads, none of whom would even qualify to be on the Bowl Selection Committee, even if they could sneak onto the grounds of the Gaylord Texan Resort & Convention Center –

      The winning entry in the 15th annual Faux Faulkner parody contest, “As I Lay Kvetching,” David Sheffield’s answer to the literary question: What if William Faulkner had written a script for the Three Stooges? Nick plays the role of Moe, Hugh plays the role of Curly and Bo plays the role of Larry in

      “As I Lay Kvetching,” by William Faulkner — Stooges Episode .1632; Revisions by Mort Freberg, Abe Shineman, Paul DeMarco,

      Curtis Ney; Eighth Draft, August 12, 1941.”

      By David Sheffield
      FADE IN:

      INTERIOR: THE COMPSON HOUSE — DAY
      She (the old woman, Mrs. Compson) had spent the better part of the morning waiting for them (the workmen) to arrive, yet they had not come; and when at length they drew the wagon into the yard and tied the mules beneath the scattershot shade of the water oak and climbed down amid the dust and moiling dogs to survey the house, she perceived to her dismay that they were stooges: two of whom were brothers (Moe and Curly Howard) and a third (Larry Fine) who claimed no part of their lineage but who was nonetheless of their ilk; come to wait, slack-jawed and splayfooted, before the great stair which led to the room where she (the old woman, Mrs. Compson) had retired; come with paints and pots of glue and damask wallpaper to cover them (the walls) afresh, while she (the old woman, Mrs. Compson) could only pray that they (the stooges) could refurbish and thereby sanctify it (the foyer) which now suspired with the age-old effluvia of honor and sacrifice and obduracy, still redolent with the wretched sweet scent of inviolability which they (her father and her father’s brothers, whose boots these stooges were unworthy to suck even so much as the laces of) had impressed into the very grain of the cypress balustrade upon which he, Moe, the eldest, now knocks — not obeisantly, not malevolently either, but indolently. Hearing no response, they break into something resembling song:

      MOE: Helloooo…
      LARRY: Helloooo ….
      CURLY: Hellooooo …
      ALL THREE: Hello!

      CURLY: Nobody’s home. Let’s break for lunch. Nyuh, nuyk, nyuk.
      MOE: Ix-nay! Put that away, numbskull!
      Then Moe, aiming his extended fore and middle fingers, thrusting them into Curly’s eye sockets, heedless of the pain or even the surcease of sight this might inflict.
      LARRY: Hey! He didn’t do nothin’!
      MOE: Oh, yeah? Sez who? (This is not for you to judge or even acknowledge, this grievance between Curly and me, but is an old blood enmity which only we Howards can comprehend, while you, being a Fine, can’t begin to plumb the depths of it. That is it. We are Howards and you are only a Fine, and being a Fine, you are not fit to regard us with anything more than sullen trepidation.) Now get going, lame brain. We got work to do.
      CURLY: La dee, la dah …
      At last it is Curly who picks up the plank, rough hewn and smelling of sweet gum, and — feeling the weight and heft and fiber of it — swings it innocently (bending to retrieve the tool, the ball-peen hammer dropped casually on Larry’s toe) and feeling the awful force of the blow as it (the plank) catches Moe upside his head and hearing the dreadful thunk of wood against bone and sinew, a sound the like of which he has not heard since his uncle (Irving) took them (Curly and Moe) to the park where he (the uncle, Irving) slapped with the blade of an oar the rotting rind of an overripe musk melon.
      MOE: Spread out!
      With his pliers Moe grasps his brother’s nose, twisting his nostrils inside out.
      CURLY: Woob, woob, woob, woob, woob.

      FADE OUT

      • Scorpio Jones, III

        Jesus, DIF, kin ah git the name of your…ah…you know, where you get your…ah…you know? 😀