Daily Archives: June 15, 2016

If goofy college mascots don’t parade, the terrorists win.

Make what you will of this.


Filed under Big Ten Football

Today, in greatness

Couldn’t let this baby pass.

Who’s the Trump campaign’s long snappah?


UPDATE:  Remember, they both have Herschel in common.



Filed under Political Wankery

Number one, number one

What could possibly go wrong with this, Brian Kelly?

There will be multiple players wearing No. 1 for Notre Dame in 2016.

Notre Dame coach Brian Kelly said Tuesday on an appearance on WSBT 96.1 FM that the team would be awarding the number on a weekly basis throughout the season.

“No. 1 we’re going to hand out from week to week,” Kelly said. “And that’s going to be the player that exemplifies himself both on and off the field in a manner that represents all the things we want a Notre Dame football player to represent.”

Should be amusing the first time a player given the number gets taken down for a rules violation, or worse.


Filed under Notre Dame's Faint Echoes

Musical palate cleanser, local boy made good edition

Sadly, another RIP.

Chips Moman, a producer and songwriter who helped define the Memphis sound in soul music in the 1960s, generated dozens of pop, soul and country hits and helped resuscitate Elvis Presley’s career in the late ’60s, died on Monday in LaGrange, Ga. He was 79.

You need to read the entire obit to see his astounding legacy.  Basically, if you like music from the ’60s, the odds are decent Moman had a hand in some of what you enjoy.

He wrote this song with Dan Penn.


Filed under Uncategorized

Today, in Baylor

Baylor fan boy invokes Gandhi in demanding that 2016 recruits not be allowed out of their signed NLIs.


Filed under Baylor Is Sensitive To Women's Issues, General Idiocy

Chubb is coming.

I keep telling ‘ya, the cherry on top of the Chubb hype sundae is inclusion on one of Phil Steele’s preseason All-SEC teams.  It’s almost a thing now.

Any thoughts on where Nick shows up?  I’m leaning third-team right now.


Filed under Georgia Football, Phil Steele Makes My Eyes Water

Shiny object syndrome

Lest we forget, here’s what all that stupid SEC schedule/division rejiggering chatter is really all about.

There’s now a new argument that maybe divisions should be abolished in the SEC just like they were in basketball a few years.

Actually, this isn’t a bad idea if you have the teams with the best two league records meet in the conference title game. It would more often than not produce a more competitive game and add a higher strength of schedule component to a matchup played the day before the College Football Playoff Commtitee meets to decide the four playoff teams for that season.

Gotta keep that selection committee interested!  I would say it’s just like the Big 12, except the weird part is that it’s the SEC that’s fighting the call.

The whole thing was a joke. Something everyone in the room could laugh about. It was just unclear why.

The scene was SEC meetings in Destin, and commissioner Greg Sankey was holding a wrap-up session one evening with the media. The subject was a potential Auburn division switch. Someone asked if it was a dead story.

“I don’t know that it was ever a live story,” Sankey said, smiling wryly. “The only time I’ve ever talked about it in Destin, Florida, was here in this room.”

So, a reporter jumped in, you talked about it in other places? People laughed.

“I was in a room in Hoover, Alabama and I was on the phone with Jon Solomon (of CBSsports.com) and he asked me,” Sankey said, still smiling.

So have you talked to your coaches about it? More laughter. More smiling from the commish.

“Since I have been commissioner,” Sankey said, going into putting-my-foot-down-with-all-you-people mode, “I have never once talked to our football coaches about any team moving to any other division.”

I can see it now – fans begin clamoring for realignment, the media keeps harping on it and the conference finally (and clumsily) embraces it just as Saban retires and the CFP expands to eight teams, rendering the whole thing moot.

Then, everyone finds a new shiny object to fixate on.


Filed under SEC Football

“That will change the entire mood of SEC football games.”

This deal with LSU banning opponents’ marching bands from performing at half time just gets weirder and weirder.  On the one hand, there’s an attempt to make it sound as if something sinister happened.

There have been incidents involving opposing band members, Nunez noted, but he declined to reveal specifics.

“Risk (management officials) looked at this because of a couple of situations that have happened in the past — very close situations, things considered something we needed to keep our eye on,” he said. “They asked us to look at this. If you remember, a year and a half ago, we went and added a fence behind our home team bench. It was part of this whole situation, trying to create a buffer.”

The incidents have not involved LSU band members, Nunez said.

“There are some situations, not between band to band,” he said.

“Usually the band communities are very cordial. They work well with each other. That’s never been a problem. Again, it goes back to some safety issue we’ve had in that small space.”

I said sinister.  Nobody said anything about coherent.

But even with that ominous cloud hanging over LSU’s brave move, there’s still a chance this aggression might not stand.

Eddie Nunez, LSU’s deputy director of athletics, said athletics officials plan to meet with members of the school’s risk management team soon to devise a safer plan for the cramped sidelines, allowing the school to lift the policy — potentially ahead of the upcoming season.

“We’re still looking at this. This is still being assessed,” Nunez said this weekend. “This is not a dead decision. This is something we’re actively looking at, going to be meeting with risk management again. We’re going to try to do what we can to make this work. If we can, we will try to make it work. We would love to continue the pageantry.”

Really, guys, if piped in music is that important to you, just go ahead and say so.  Besides, think of all that extra revenue you can take in when you sell those seats you used to give to other schools’ bands!


Filed under It's All Just Made Up And Flagellant, SEC Football

Quite the career path you’ve chosen, fella.

Well, here’s one you don’t hear every day: a man who once held an equity position in one of Michigan’s largest law firms and was well connected enough to have been considered the favorite in a race for a Congressional seat sued his firm for treating his decision to take a temporary leave of absence to join Alabama’s coaching staff as a withdrawal.  (He lost.)

Best of all, he characterized the move as “a temporary career enhancing opportunity … that could help the firm expand its legal practice”.  Uh huh.  That’s what they all say.

So where is he now?

After owning a stake Michigan’s oldest law firm, Altobelli has been on the Alabama staff in a relatively low-level position since. He was paid a total of $45,318 in 2015, according to University of Alabama payroll records, to be one of eight analysts on the football staff. The title is also held by several young coaching prospects like William Vlachos and Wes Neighbors, both of whom played at Alabama in the last five seasons.

Sounds like his practice has really taken off.


Filed under General Idiocy, Nick Saban Rules

Corch, I find your faith disturbing.

Tim Tebow, a GPOOE™ for the rest of civilization.

The next thing you know, Meyer’s going to have a copy of the promise plaque installed on a wall at The Shoe.

You’d think the Buckeyes could find somebody of their own worthy of inspiration.  Besides, didn’t Tebow beat Ohio State to win a national title?


Filed under Tim Tebow: Rock Star, Urban Meyer Points and Stares