Around the horn

After watching a bunch of yesterday’s action, I’ve come to the only conclusion possible: College football, you’re drunk.

Which isn’t to say drunk can’t be entertaining.  Anyway, a few random observations from the season’s first Saturday:

• Luke Del Rio is Florida’s Greyson Lambert.
• Cam Cameron is to Les Miles what Brian Schottenheimer was to Mark Richt.  Les, in case you’re not sure, that’s an ominous comparison.
• As embarrassing as LSU’s loss to Wisconsin was, it’s probably no worse than fourth on the list for the day.  Kentucky blew a three-touchdown lead to a mid-major with an offense coached by the coordinator Stoops fired after last season. Mississippi State lost on a clanked field goal to South Alabama.
• At the top of the list, though, was USC’s humiliating seal-clubbing at the hands of Alabama.  It was the worst opening day loss in the program’s history.  Pat Haden’s legacy as a complete disaster as an athletic director is cemented.
• The best coached team I watched play Saturday was Houston.  That’s a team that knows exactly what it wants to do on offense and goes out and does it.  It’s a talented team, too, as its complete emasculation of Oklahoma’s offensive line showed.
• The weirdest game I saw was Auburn-Clemson.  Clemson looked like a team that had some rust to shake off, and maybe needed a little attitude adjustment.  Auburn looked somewhat competent on defense and totally off the rails on offense.  If Gus Malzahn is trying to sabotage his reputation as an offensive guru, he did an excellent job of it last night.  The only way to describe his quarterback rotation is flailing.
• Don’t look now, but Texas A&M may be at a point where it’s going to win games with its defense instead of its offense.
• If I were enough of a Virginia fan to care, I’d be wearing a bag over my head today. They were joined by two other teams that lost to FCS foes, Iowa State and Washington State.

Needless to say, I’m not looking forward to putting together this week’s SEC Power Poll.