Golden showers

In something straight out of Derek Dooley’s Personal Hygiene 101, evidently this is a real thing for Texas football.

How would you like to be called out for being a bad guy about the color of your urine?  My only remaining question is whether Herman’s got support staffers going around checking the hue of his players’ pee.

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23 Comments

Filed under Texas Is Just Better Than You Are., The Body Is A Temple

23 responses to “Golden showers

  1. BMan

    If the urine is blood red, would that equate to “Your opponent is a bad guy” or “You should see a urologist” in Coach Herman’s world?

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  2. MLB2

    I’m a selfish teammate because I take multivitamins.

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  3. The Georgia Way

    Level 9: “YOU HAVE SHIT YOURSELF. TIME TO TAKE YOUR DRUNKEN ASS HOME.”

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  4. AlphaDawg

    The USMC has been doing this for decades. There is a similar placard above just about every urinal on every USMC base i’ve ever been on.

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    • Mad Mike

      Ha! I had forgotten about those pee charts. “Hydration is key Devil Dogs!”

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    • KornDawg

      First thing I thought of when I saw the pic was the charts over the troughs in the head on Parris Island. We were even questioned about it during Battalion CO inspection. Side note, once our DI was angry with our drill performance, so he threw the platoon flag, stick and all, in the trough while we were pissing in it. To be fair, we sucked at drill.

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      • Mad Mike

        I’m sure your guide just loved carrying around a piss covered guidon the rest of the cycle.

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        • KornDawg

          I never really thought about it, but I guess he wouldn’t like that. At least it was the first phase flag, we got a new one after the rifle range.

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  5. watcher16

    Go to the kids page and look at the follow-up tweets: Classic:

    “Memo to Texas football players: If your urine burns, don’t consult the hydration chart. See a doctor immediately.”

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  6. jtp03

    We have a similar hydration chart in our athletic and training facilities as well. Not sure that it goes so far as to call you out for being a bad person on it, though.

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    • The Georgia Way

      Those were from the Dr. Adams days.

      The left column indicated the number of games you would be suspended.

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  7. Daniel Simpson Day

    The hydration chart at Oregon must have a 9 for the post work out leak.

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  8. Sanford222view

    I thought that was a Georgia Tech uniform color chart.

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  9. gastr1

    But 4 and 5 are virtually the same color! Did they just decide that an odd number of stages wasn’t symmetrical and orderly enough? Inquiring minds want to know.

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  10. BeardDawg

    So I just checked, and I don’t know what “Area 51” is, but I am headed there. I’m a selfish teammate.

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  11. MDDawg

    I like how it calls them out for being horrible people, rather than focusing on the health risks of dehydration. Why bother saying “drink more fluids” or “tell Coach you need an IV” when you can assault their character? In fact, I don’t think it goes far enough. There should be a 9th level that says something like “You have brought shame to your family!”

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  12. AusDawg85

    9th should be blue…”Congratulations, you are pregnant!”

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  13. Had this chart in high school and college for the baseball team. Never thought red made me a bad team mate, just full of kidney stones.

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