I don’t often do requests…

… but Uglydawg asked nicely, and it is a slow day, so here goes:

We make fun of GT’s “Two hotdogs and two cokes” (or whatever it was) promotion.

Maybe give your bloggers  an opportunity to assign appropriate ticket “packages” to match other schools (perceived) fan bases.

Someone may respond, for instance, “Kentucky,  two bourbons on the rocks, a box of KFC and basketball schedule”

I recently poked fun at Tennessee with “Four beers, four pickled eggs and a can of Skoal”.

Have at it.  And try to keep it clean, you scamps.


Filed under College Football, GTP Stuff

27 responses to “I don’t often do requests…

  1. Florida – 4 Natty Lights, 4 fried mullet sandwiches, and a copy of the Gator bestseller, The History of College Football Since 1990.


  2. Anonymous

    South Carolina, Charleston package:
    4 Michelob Ultras
    Lobster tails
    Private airfield to stadium service

    Everywhere else in Sakerlina package:
    4 Steel Reserves
    Pork rinds
    No citations issued for fighting the other team’s fans!


  3. Cojones

    Nooner’s surprise : bring your Techster buns and the opposition will supply the spotted dick.


  4. South Carolina – 4 Cheerwines and a lame ass Matchbox Trolley

    Florida – 4 Cokes and a 4-pack of Wife Beaters

    Tennessee – 4 Cokes and 4 orange dual-purpose vests for hunting and trash-pick-up for doing DUI parole community service

    Vanderbilt – 4 Cokes and Waived Stub Hub Fees to Sell Tickets to Away Team Fans

    Mizzou – 4 Cokes and $20 gift certificate for Shakespeare Pizza

    Kentucky – 4 Cokes and Better odds in basketball season ticket lottery

    Bama – 4 Cokes and $20 of overrated Dreamland BBQ and Danny White’s phone number

    Auburn – 4 Cokes and a 4-pack of Charmin and 4 Alabama State Champion Ring Replicas

    Ole Miss – 4 Cokes and an inflated sense of self-worth tied to overrated tailgating

    Mississippi State – 4 Cokes and SlingTV Account to watch Dan Mullen’s Florida team play on SECN and SECN+

    Arkansas – 4 Cokes and a Netflix subscription to watch Ozark

    LSU – 4 Cokes and 4 Corndogs and 4 sticks of deodorant so they stop smelling like corndogs

    Texas A&M – 4 Cokes and a Johnny Manzeil Memorial Mugshot Replica


  5. Mayor

    LSU: Two crawfish (eaten live and swallowed whole) drowned by 2 Hurricanes (the drink not the storm).


  6. Dawg19

    “Try to keep it clean”

    Well, I’m out.


  7. Uglydawg

    UCF, four bottles of sour grape rose’, twelve cupcakes, one overcooked eagle, and a plastic replica of the NC trophy.

    Auburn, two “Get out of Jail Free “cards and four tickets to the dog track,four Slim Jim sausages and four sticks of seasoned oak firewood.

    Alabama, a door prize drawing ticket. Third place prize, three dinners with Paul Finebaum and Phyllis from Mulga, second prize a suitable for framing, signed picture of Harvey Updyke,, two dinners with Paul and Phyllis, First prize, one dinner with them and four sticks of seasoned oak firewood.

    Tennessee, four cups with Fulmer’s picture on them, four t-shirts with Fulmer’s picture on them, four “suitable for framing” pictures of Fulmer standing net to Peyton. Four “Great Smokey Mtns” wooden flutes with a little piece of paper that shows how to hold your fingers to play “Rocky Top”.

    Florida, four nit combs, four bottles of sulfer water from Desoto’s Fountain of Youth, Four ice cubes and jiggers of Southern Comfort to conditon the water, four barf bags.

    FSU. Four crab legs, four pair of blinders, and a foam tomahawk.

    LSU, Four cleaned and ready for the barbie muskrats, four cleaned and ready for the barbie squirrels, four glasses of Wild Turkey redeemable before kickoff, four glasses of Ezra Williams redeemable in the fourth quarter.


  8. Bulldog Joe

    Mississippi – Two mint juleps and a burner phone.

    Missouri – Two race cards and your very own safe space.

    Florida State – Two crab legs and witness immunity.

    A&M – Two white jumpers and a jizz jar.

    Clemson – Two baked taters and a $100 handshake.

    Alabama – Two rolls of paper and box of detergent.

    Auburn – Two rolls of paper and a bottle of whine.

    LSU – Two minutes and the clock running.

    Tennessee – Two boxes of Franzia and a hose.

    Georgia Tech – Two fried fish and a punch in the face.

    Florida – Two years probation and community service.


  9. Tuscaloosa Marry your own relative at halftime and a special roll tide bag of Finebaum condoms.


  10. Oh forgot, Auburn: A free beat up pickup truck with Skoal stains already below the windows for you and your spouse.


  11. Bigshot

    AU 4 get of jail free cards 4 2×4’s from the “yella” man and 4 passes to Victoryland


  12. BeardDawg

    Auburn- 4 cokes and 4 player transfers from UGA


  13. Cpark58

    Alabama- 2 random mascots+2 timely calls/no calls of your choosing redeemable with any conference officiating crew. Bonus: the first 20,000 through the gate get a certificate for a segregation era national championships as determined by boys’ life magazine(any year, no consensus necessary).

    Not to be outdone, Auburn released their plan for 2018- 4 random mascots, 4 blatant NCAA violation passes, and 4 free psychiatrist sessions for inferiority complex.


  14. AdaWg

    From my experience working at a restaurant across from the Ga Dome, Tennessee fans would be “4 sweet teas, 2 well done steaks split for 4 people, and a 12% tip.”


  15. CB

    Bama – two 5 star gray shirts, and one drunk LSU fan with a tea bag consent form crammed into his back pocket.

    Auburn – two disappointing Georgia transfers, and two pairs of ear muffs to wear during the most irritating pregame in the conference.

    Tennessee – Unlimited optimism for the Pruitt/Fulmer era, a can of varnish to be used on the rusty outer facade of Neyland Stadium, and two shots of white lightning to help you forget that the 98 title was only won because of a Chris Wienke injury.

    Sackerlina – One Marcus Lattimore highlight video to help you remember the time your program was almost relevant, and so you won’t notice when Kirby takes the top in-state recruit every year.

    Florida – Two Tebow eye black stickers, and super glue for the BCS trophy that Orson Charles smashed.

    Tech – Two redbulls to wake you up for the weekly noon kicks, and a flask of cheap brown whiskey because you aren’t good enough to choose the kind of whiskey you drink.

    Clemson – Two Walmart hand stamps for unlimited free entry to every game forever, and a post game field pass that you’ll never have to use because ACC schools actually allow fans on the field after games. You’ll also get a video of all the best Dabo quotes that will be zero seconds long.