“If drinking were a national sport, USC would probably be number one.”

An alert reader emailed me the link to this, and all I can say is, what else is there to do in Columbia, South Carolina?

So many drunk University of South Carolina students are being transported to the emergency room during home football games that stretchers line the hallways of Palmetto Health Baptist, emergency services are strained and drunken antics slow nurses who are trying to tend to the truly sick.

“They try to run away, fight people, pee in the corner,” said a nurse at Palmetto Health Baptist. “It’s been that way the whole time I’ve worked there.”

Young, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, kids, Columbia, or no Columbia.

16 Comments

Filed under 'Cock Envy, The Body Is A Temple

16 responses to ““If drinking were a national sport, USC would probably be number one.”

  1. Bulldog Joe

    Binge drinking + Columbia heat + losing = ER.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Impossible – UGA fans are the abhorrent ones, according to them.

    I love the quote about the student biting the nurse. Good hell. I’ve been drunk many, many times in my life, but never to the point where I would actually bite medical personnel who were trying to help me.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. 81Dog

    Columbia SC is the most sweltering, miserable hell hole in the SEC, maybe anywhere. By comparison. Macon has the balmy climate of Los Angeles and the cultural elan of Paris. If they built a big fence around Columbia and kept the rest of the world out, I wouldn’t miss a single thing about it except the annual crash/burn cycle of Chikin fans bragging in August, getting drilled in September, and hoping for bowl eligibility by Halloween.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Uglydawg

      Then there’s Tallahassee.

      Like

    • Macallanlover

      Those Macon comparisons and the final sentence make that a quality comment. Wonder if there are any stats on which game this season brought in the most guests to Palmetto Health Baptist?

      Like

    • RCHSDawg1975

      That describes USC fans perfectly! I live in Sumter SC which is second in Chicken fans to Columbia and I see everything first hand that sucks about USC. I get cussed at, people cut me off in traffic and blow their car horns and shoot me the bird. But after all that I still love flying/wearing my Dawg gear everywhere I go in SC.

      Like

  4. Gaskilldawg

    USC is just as bad at drinking as it is at football.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Do they play sandstorm in the waiting room?

    Liked by 2 people

    • 81Dog

      They probably DO play Sandstorm, which they seem to think has magical powers. Also, I bet they play that annoying chicken sound on a loop, and the medical personnel all wear black.

      Like

  6. BMan

    “If drinking were a national sport, USC would probably be number one.”
    Well, they’d probably be number 25 at best, but claiming that “next year they are going to make a run at the title.”

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Governor Milledge

    I lived close to 5 Points COLA in grad school – it’s a completely different bar scene than Athens. 5 Points, beyond maybe 2 or 3 bars, is entirely geared for underclassmen at night. The Vista, on other side of town, is where most professionals and grad students will generally go out. As long as they contain the issue (and minimize robberies/assaults), they have no internal pressure to change 5 Points bar scene

    Like

  8. AusDawg85

    UCF will be flying a banner over the USC hospital claiming their national championship in drinking.

    Like

  9. JasonC

    When you have no Game, all your left with is a bunch of Cocks.

    Like