Those gaps aren’t going to close themselves.

I have to say the people running Saturday Down South have done a fine job developing a reputation for top notch satirical work.  Clever satire is hard to pull off, but here’s an excellent example of the genre.

I mean, how snarky is it to bury the lede in a piece entitled “How Florida closed the gap on Georgia and Alabama with a strong Signing Day finish”?

For the first time since the inception of recruiting rankings, Florida’s football roster will lack a 5-star recruit in the 2019 season.

Still, the Gators penned 17 blue-chip recruits (4- or 5-stars), a number only exceeded nationally by Alabama (25), Georgia (22) and Penn State (18).

Closing the gap by losing ground with elite prospect signings is sarcasm I can only dream of pulling off.

Oh, wait… you mean he was serious about that?  I guess his bio should have tipped me off:

Neil Blackmon covers Florida football for An attorney and two-time graduate of the University of Florida…

Don’t quit your day job, Neil.


Filed under Gators, Gators..., Media Punditry/Foibles, Recruiting

15 responses to “Those gaps aren’t going to close themselves.

  1. Timphd

    Too bad he was trying to be serious. It was a funny article. They not only “closed the gap” on UGA and Bama, they also closed the gap on A&M and LSU, who they also trail. Funny he didn’t mention that they finished 5th in the SEC.


  2. Biggen

    That site is awful. I stopped reading it long ago as it’s filled with homers not journalists.


    • JasonC

      SDS and TeamSpeedKills have pretty much become unreadable. Most of them love to $h!t on Georgia and there’s too many homers and stupid clickbait articles.
      The Florida guy and the South Carolina guy that used to run TSK definitely weren’t pro-Georgia, but at least they were knowledgable and created some decent to solid content.


      • Tony Barnfart

        And anything on USA Today networks because the ad popping is overwhelming. Literally they freeze my computer.


  3. So which was it? Florida has no talent…. Once Mullen gets his guys in ‘look out’ or was it Florida returns 10 on offense and 7 on defense, not including 4 players that were suspended from the year before, plus Mullen’s first recruiting class?

    With those last three classes with the following 247 Rankings?

    18 – 14
    17 – 11
    16 – 10

    I’m sick of this narrative… That was a very talented team last year and still ended up getting spanked by a much younger UGA team. Gators are going through the same denial Dawg fans did in the late 80’s – early 90’s. Their dreams of dominance in the East are just that – dreams.


  4. A TWO time graduate…….what the 1st time didn’t take neil. In fact next you choose to pen anything concerning UGA, you should kneel!


  5. Go Dawgs!

    This must be that new math that I keep hearing about.


  6. Russ

    I read the comments to that article. I’m immediately more stupid than before.


  7. Texas Dawg

    They could have still had a positive story. With the close of signing day the Gators feel relieved. They have finally slightly slowed the rate at which they are falling behind the elite. Coach Mullen stated that before singing day he feared that they would totally loose sight of their biggest rivals in the recruiting wars. He said that was not the case any longer. “With a good pair of high powered binoculars, we can still see their tail lights in the distance. Granted they continue to pull away, but this recruiting class ensures it will take a little longer before we totally loose sight of them”.


  8. Lorenzo

    Closed the gap!? By acknowledging the preexisting gap, with No 5*s and less total blue chips than UGA and Bama, at very best this was just slowing the bleeding, not stopping it, and definitely not ‘closing the gap’. The gap just simply grew. Just happy talk from a homer journalist.


  9. Hal Evans

    Since Mullen was commenting on singing day will he be on the Masked Singer TV show? LOL


  10. Pingback: Gap is the new cannon shot. | Get The Picture