Straight from the Auburn school of interior design

So, Gus Malzahn’s house has a place that looks like it came right out of a 1980s sports bar.

The wall mural is something, but it’s the Galaga machine that really ties the room together.  Makes you wonder if Gus put urinals in the bathroom.

48 Comments

Filed under Auburn's Cast of Thousands, Stylin'

48 responses to “Straight from the Auburn school of interior design

  1. Bigshot

    He is from Arkansas, after all?

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  2. Who paints a three-times-lifesize likeness of themselves on their wall? I admit that I am not one of those “celebrity cribs” watchers, but having that huge mural featuring HIMSELF seems a bit … egotistical.

    Liked by 4 people

    • I am very, very happy knowing in my heart of hearts that CKS (and CMR for that matter) have never had a mural of themselves in their homes.

      Like

    • Thecoondawg

      I taught at a PAC Conference back in the mid 90’s and remember a speaker saying “If you go into someone’s office and they have an I love me wall with an oversized picture of themselves I would bet good money the guy has terrible leadership qualities and is an overall a$$8ole. You could use every bad adjective to describe them”
      This statement was 100% accurate as it was exemplified in every time I encountered it.

      Like

  3. OrlandoDawg

    That’s about the level of tackiness one would expect from a head coach at Auburn.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Yes there are urinals at the residence…that’s where the “hurry up no huddle” originated….indoor plumbing on the plains, who’d a thunk it

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    • RangerRuss

      I have a urinal at my residence. About thirty feet from my back patio at the wood line.
      Auburn. What a shithole.

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      • Cojones

        Mine is also air fresco for 240ft of Corps lakefront. Sometimes I run out when I hear their airboat and wave at them with the last of my atrophying member as they go by. Their trees went through my boathouse in three places, I had to pay to remove their trees from my leased corps property and boathouse as well as pay for later removal of dead and dying trees that remained as a danger to my adjoining constructed property. I’ve allowed a return of their property to a more natural state by planting a few trees and allowing undergrowth to take over, plus broadcasting wildflowers to help the birds and other wildlife.

        It has overgrown such that sometimes I have to get on one of the taller stumps to wave at them.

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        • Correct. You cannot remove the trees until AFTER they have crushed the dock. I am familiar with the corps but since you mentioned public indecency and corps property I can’t resist.
          Past my dock in the back of the cove is the neighborhood dock for a 55 plus community. Last fall working on the dock on a warm day, I figured I’d cool off with a quick swim but had no swimsuit. “No problem” says I nobody’s around so I figured a skinny dip wouldn’t hurt anyone. I was mid naked leap when the 55 plus coed kayak club came around the point. They are very friendly and keep close to the docks so they all paddled by an said hello, chatting with me and among themselves. I had to tread water for 30 minutes or so until they made the other point and by that time the faster (relative) paddlers were on the way back. I ended up in the water for over an hour. The day was warm, the water was not.

          Liked by 2 people

      • The Tick

        I’m a man. The world is my urinal.

        (But don’t tell my wife I said that!)

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        • RangerRuss

          “I have to go back to contonment to use the bathroom.”
          Sir, the whole damn world is a latrine.
          “But I have to do number two, Captain.”
          Young RR just smiles.

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    • Muttley

      Over the urinals it says HURRY UP NO PUDDLE.

      Liked by 3 people

    • Bulldog Joe

      The tweet responses are good.

      Liked by 3 people

  5. scottrollins

    I played Galaga all the time at the Tokens arcade on Old National Hwy in College Park when I was growing up. Thanks for ruining that memory for me, Gus

    Liked by 1 person

  6. gastr1

    The great thing about an interior mural like that is you don’t need any furniture– it would just block parts of the view! (Like Galaga does now, amiright?)

    Like

  7. 81Dog

    The resale value of that double wide is really going to drop after they fire him. And you know they will. One meh year, and adios. The only thing saving him so far is his (somewhat) ability to beat Alabama. If LSU and a&m surpass them, buh bye.

    Like

  8. sniffer

    I’ve seen him driving around Mountain Brook in that gawd awful BMW whateverI8something supercar. No surprise, its fucking blue.

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  9. tbia

    If you’ve ever seen his batshit crazy wife, this would not be surprising in the least.

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  10. Spike

    I don’t know why.. but seeing this reminds me of that great song from a few years back “We’re Going to Hire a Wino (to Decorate Our House)’. There is just no accounting for taste..

    Liked by 1 person

  11. rchris

    It looks like they decorated the house with recruiting in mind.

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  12. Sanford222view

    Don’t be dissing Galaga now! That was my game growing up.

    My biggest let down in life was after the World’s Fair in Knoxville. I think it was held in 1982. My dad worked for a real estate development company and they were involved with some of the hotels and convention centers built for that event. My dad indicated when the fair was over we would get one of the Galaga video game machines from the fair. I was so excited being 12 at the time.

    I don’t know what happened. I am guessing my mom intervened and said it would not be a good thing to have at the house because I would play it all the time. I was crushed and to top things off I remember that next Christmas instead of the Adidas sweatsuit I was hoping for I received a knock-off World’s Fair version that had the World’s Fair logo instead of the Adidas logo on it. I never wore it because I was afraid I would get mocked for it. First world problems!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Muttley

      I got addicted to Galaga in 1995-’96 during work breaks, working for Warner Brothers on the Michael Jordan/Bugs Bunny feature, Our office tower adjoined the Sherman Oaks Galleria (RIP) of “Fast Times” and “Valley Girl” fame. I got so familiar with it I could fire at ships flight patterns long before they appeared.

      I finally turned the thing completely over at over a million points, with dozens of bepimpled preteens gathered and watching in awe, and said “enough”.

      Like

  13. Doug

    Every time I see this I think of Lionel Hutz’s “works on contingency no money down” card. HURRY UP? NO, HUDDLE!

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  14. Gurkha Dawg

    I never cared much for Galaga back in the day. Maybe I sensed that in the distant future it would be linked to an evil presence.

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  15. W Cobb Dawg

    I remember putting that ping-pong table at the curb with a “FREE” sign on it. It was gone the next morning. Now I know where it ended up.

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    • RangerRuss

      HAhahahaha! Maybe Gus is attempting to entice the next Gump as he thinks the movie was a documentary.
      The shithead.

      Like

  16. I saw a guy in an Auburn shirt, mask around his neck the whole time, shopping his ass off at the Whole Foods here in Nashville. I bet he pulls it up over his face when he sees a ‘Bama fan, though. Lotsa Auburn smarts right there.

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  17. Bulldog Joe

    Ahem…

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  18. TN Dawg

    Lol.

    The interior decorating blog.

    What does everyone think of Saban’s choice of china patterns?

    I think it’s far to ornate to go with the stemware.

    Like

  19. CEPH

    He has one (small) problem with the car he bought to impress the recruits, his fat ass wife won’t fit in the passenger side. Oh well, Bobby Petrinos girlfriend fit on a motorcycle so maybe he could sell it to him she would probably fit!!!!

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  20. CEPH

    There is one ( small) problem with the car he bought to impress the recruits, his wifes fat ass won’t fit in the passenger side. Oh well, maybe he can sell it to Petrino after all his girlfriend fit on a motorcycle so just maybe she would fit.

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  21. Harold Miller

    I thought it was the rug that really tied the room together.

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  22. Whiskey Dawg

    “Hurry Up, No Huddle” – heard it started out as his wife’s mantra.

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  23. Dawg19

    (Geoff Collins’ living room)

    “Hurry up, No Huddle House”

    Liked by 2 people

  24. FlyingPeakDawg

    Toilet paper drapes would really pull that look together. Where’s Joanna Gaines when you need her?

    Like