Folks, I don’t know how to break this to you other than to just come right out with it, but with Todd Monken’s departure from Athens, the party is over. There’s a new sheriff in town. Oh, and that goes for you, too, Tuscaloosa.
The Tennessee Vols haven’t won the SEC since 1998.
And they’ve never reached the College Football Playoff.
Alabama and Georgia, meanwhile, have won a combined 13 SEC Championships since 1998. And they’ve won the last three national championships.
But despite those accomplishments, Tennessee is set up better for longterm success than Alabama or Georgia.
Crazy talk, right?
Maybe not as crazy as you think.
Or, crazy like a fox, amirite? What’s the Vols’ secret sauce? Glad you asked.
Tennessee may have found their Saban/Smart in Josh Heupel.
And Heupel comes with a built-in advantage that neither Saban nor Smart posses.
Heupel is an offensive guru. He’s not reliant on making the right offensive coordinator hire for his offense to work. It all starts with Heupel.
Which is why Heupel will never have to go through what Alabama and Georgia went through this offseason.
Oh.
Eventually, Saban and/or Smart are going to make the wrong hire. And their offense is going to be a disaster.
Dude, Kirby’s already made that wrong hire. And despite Coley’s ineptitude, the 2019 Dawgs still went 12-2, won the East and finished fourth in the final AP poll. Let us know when UT manages to hit any of those benchmarks.
Get The Picture 
Where is Ranger Russ when we need him
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Those inbred hoogies butt chugging rotgut ‘shine and huffing jenkem are just letting it all hang out. There’s no ramifications or consequences for their fucktarded predictions which are really just their dreams. Seeing those dreams shattered yearly never gets old.
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“Let me tell you about this dream I had last night”
Worst words in the English language
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Forget red dye #2 as being harmful, that puke orange color causes brain damage, tooth decay, alcoholism, and obesity.
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2nd worst. First is what happens after you ask an 18 handicap golfer in the bar, “How’d you play?” If you’re not a golfer, just know to never, ever do this.
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Defense is obviously irrelevant.
A fucking legendary genius right here:
https://www.espn.com/college-football/game/_/gameId/401403953
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Offense beats defense every time, right? Athens this year must have been an exception to the rule. We could have beat them this year with Coley as offensive coordinator.
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What a fool. Tennessee is still a state devoid of deep talent (and what’s there is practically 2 states away from Knoxville in Memphis).
I think South Carolina just scored again, Zach.
Is it bad of me to hope Bama needs a 3rd digit on the Bryant-Denny scoreboard when Tooth Nation comes to T-town next fall?
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Frankly, I don’t care who wins that game.
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I know who I’ll be rooting for (it ain’t Tennesssee)
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Oh no…a Vol win is just too much entertainment. Do they have hoses in Tuscaloosa?
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I will never cheer for the f*cking Gumps unless it was absolutely necessary for Georgia to advance. I cheer for UT and Auburn whenever they play Bama. If the Taliban played the Tide, I’d be yelling “Allahu Akbar!”
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Nuke em all…
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Vols by fiddy, y’all.
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They “finna” eat. 🙄
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Eating what they’re whackn’. Nasty bastards.
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Freshly churned man-butter, no doubt…LuLu swears by a good old fashion Pantene shot to the head…remember, Kirby can’t afford “those” Hookers…gapped tooth, mouth breathing Urnge wearing hillbillies…for Pete’s sake, find a less stagnant gene pool!
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😂😂
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Heupel is their Saban or Smart? One (of many) problems with that is that Smart hasn’t finished lower than sixth nationally in recruiting, and Saban has been in the top five, usually first, for the last 15 or so years. Heupel has yet to finish higher than ninth in his three classes, and they aren’t tearing up ’24 so far.
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He can coach ’em up, though! A poor man’s Dan Mullen, even.
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Where have we heard something similar to this before? Oh yeah, Dan Mullen. Ah yes, when in doubt pull and old trope out of the fire.
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Let me fix that for him:
And Smart comes with a built-in advantage that Heupel does not posses(s) [spelling is difficult for Vols, I know].
Smart is an defensive guru. He’s not reliant on making the right defensive coordinator hire for his defense to work. It all starts with Smart.
Which is why Smart will never have to go through what Tennessee went through during the entire 2021 and 2022 seasons of not being able to stop anyone and giving up SIXTY-THREE points to SPENCER RATTLER and South Carolina.
Yeah, that’s more accurate.
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Post of the day, DF1995!
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We need Agent Thumbs to keep a low profile this fall.
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He’s the DC in waiting.
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The twitter responses to this guy when he posted it there are priceless: Rodney Garner is the key to the defense this year. No, seriously.
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…Rodney Garner is the key ..
I already see a problem. I am sure I am not the only one.
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I guess we will be hearing this narrative from the Talking Yo-yos on Gameday’s few show of the year.
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Never mind the defense. Or Shane Beamer.
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That’s pretty big talk from a program that still hasn’t figured out how to consistently hold Sakerlina below the half-century mark.
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Sakerlina whipping Tennessee’s ass last season was the absolute best non-Dawg game in all of ’23. If Hooker didn’t get hurt, they still would’ve lost. No defense.
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Come across him from time to time by accident on Twitter. An idiot fanboy
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The Joe Milton III Experience will be spectacular. I can’t wait to watch it unfold. When they inevitably turn to Nico, we will truly see the brilliance of Heupel on display ending with a 7-6 record.
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“How much you wanna make a bet [he] can throw a football over them mountains?”
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Go route? Over the mountain. Five-yard curl? Also over the mountain. That’s the beauty of The Experience.
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Tennessee continues to lead the conference in dumbass tacks, UTjr. writers, who are homers with dumbass takes. This guy was one of the one’s talking pure smack before the game in Athens last year as well. By the time Georgia sees UTjr. in Knoxville, they’ll be effectively knocked out and Georgia will be looking to just pad their wins heading toward the SEC Championship Game. Man… there are some ‘stupid’ UTjr. fans.
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Let’s see now, get my crayons out and just circle November 18th as a day big urnge kuntry screams about a moral victory when trailing at half time by 16 and losing by 28 points, as UGA football plays 3 dimensional chess while big urnge kuntry plays checkers at the checker board yard sale, UGA football special teams has to wear snorkel and masks while kicking FG’s through the river bound goal posts…GO DAWGS!!
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This knucklehead had it right the first time when he asked “..Crazy talk?” .. uh yeah. He should have just shut up right there.
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If only Kirby was a mastermind on one side of the ball or the other.
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I can’t wait for them to go down like a Chinese balloon.
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Now that right there…. that’s funny!
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http://www.cfbstats.com/2022/leader/911/team/offense/split13/category10/sort01.html
Just gonna leave that there
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Every offensive genius who becomes a head coach is set for life, amirite? I can’t think of any of them who eventually had to relieve themselves of play calling duties.
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Heupel is just the next Gus or Mumme. Kirby has already figured out how to stop Heupel’s one trick and apparently he doesn’t have another.
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The ONLY reason I would want UToothless to remain as an annual opponent is to have the pleasure of beating their ass every year as opposed to every other year during the Kirby Era.
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Zach, put the keyboard down and go with these men. They’re here to help you.
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IMO, beating them is more fun when they have a delusion of hope (which never really expires up there in them hills). Destroying all of their dreams and slowly choking the life out of them this year after they were all sure they had the best team in the country and were a shoe-in for a national championship run was priceless. Watching what Shane did to them a few weeks later was just icing on the cake. Never change hillbillies. Never change.
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I live in TN. They had all these hipster trucker hats made that said “Feels Like 98.” Funny, I didn’t see them after November 5th and haven’t since.
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UT doesn’t have much of a defense and they sure don’t have the dudes in the trenches to compete for a championship. The entire article is written for rainbow and unicorn pumpers. Sucks to be them.
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I hope Saban lays a half hundred on them (very likely after their low class behavior in Knoxville last year…throwing their goalposts in the river. Maybe they’ll do it again this year if they can hold South Carolina under fifty).
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Just for fun.
If you think we hate Tennessee, Bama fans say “hold my beer”.
So, if any Bama fan is reading this.
Get a bunch of frat boys to start planning on dressing as hillbillys for the Tennessee game. After the game (which Bama should easily win) they go and take down the goal post (or have a PVC one painted orange handy near the stadium) and throw it in the Black Warrior River. Make a huge production of it. Video and everything. Or do it ahead of time and video it and show it on the big screen in BD Stadium.
Do it, Bama. I won’t love you for it but I’ll hate you less.
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If you look up “disaster” in the dictionary, it references the 2022 Tennessee-SC game
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One of the regrettable attributes of a shitty writer is the need to have a series of one or two sentence paragraphs, as if he needs to isolate and highlight each pearl of wisdom. It has the opposite effect – instead of viewing the train wreck in its entirety, we get the thrill of examining each individual car and weighing its solitary contribution to the overall disaster.
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Perfect metaphor.
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Sadly UT D held us to 1 pt of our 2nd lowest pt total last season (14 pts under our season avg.).
Now remove our home crowd noise/(UT false starts) put us on the sec road stage where we fall behind 2 scores, we still need to be able to quick strike when we have no margin for error. (see mizzou game last year). Here’s hoping the UT warp speed O falls back to earth and we don’t have this problem in Knoxville.
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I’m assuming this isn’t sarcasm? Georgia threw it up and down the field until the rain blew in. At which point, Georgia was willing to run into a wall and punt, if necessary.
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The first sentence of that phuk’n diatribe says it all…
“The Tennessee Vols have not won the SEC since 1998.”
Phuk’n idiot!!
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They’re like the worst Bond villain ever: “All we need to do is control the weather, Mr. Bond, and THEN we’re UNSTOPPABLE…”
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Gotta love this take from UT fans on that article:
“Imagine what Heupel could do with the level of talent uga and bama get year over year.”
I’m guessing he sees 30-0 and 4 world championship in a row, since as a Dawg fan I don’t have to “imagine” shit.
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