Category Archives: General Idiocy

How do you know you’re dealing with an overmatched athletic director?

When the school blames an epically bad buyout clause on the coach’s agent.

And not for Mike MacIntyre, who is set to make more money than he ever has in his life over the next three years despite his termination last month at the University of Colorado.

After making $2.9 in guaranteed pay during his last season at CU, he now is set to collect about $4.9 million a year over the next three years, including paychecks from CU and his new job as defensive coordinator at Ole Miss. Ole Miss confirmed to USA TODAY it will pay MacIntyre $1.5 million a year over the next three years.

Colorado athletics spokesman David Plati also confirmed to USA TODAY that CU is on the hook to pay MacIntyre his full contract buyout of $10.3 million in monthly payments through 2021. His contract at Colorado initially was signed shortly after his hiring in late 2012 and said he had a duty to obtain new employment in the event of his firing from CU. It also said that the buyout owed to him would be reduced by any amounts he received as a college head coach, NFL head coach or NFL assistant coach.

In this case, he did not get one of those jobs and instead took a demotion as a college assistant coach. Therefore CU is on the hook to pay him the full buyout, setting him up to become far richer for being fired than he would have been if he had been retained at Colorado, at least over the next three years. That’s up to $4.9 million in average combined pay per year…

Asked why CU limited a buyout reduction to those specific job ranks, athletics spokesman Plati said, “that’s the latest with head coaches” and suggested it came from MacIntyre’s agent.

Like taking candy from a baby…

And these morons try to pretend they’re the smartest guys in the room.

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UPDATE:  You really can’t make this shit up.

State law prohibits any higher education employee to be contracted for more than five years. So why did University of Colorado Board of Regents approve a six-year contract for new football coach Mel Tucker on Wednesday?

In a word: oops.

Wednesday morning, the board voted 6-2 in favor of Tucker’s contract to run Jan. 1, 2019 through Dec. 31, 2024. That’s six years. Based on the language of the approved contract, which includes annual raises of $275,000, the deal is worth $18.5 million rather than $14.8 million.

However, Ken McConnellogue, CU’s vice president of communications, told The Denver Post the extra year was an oversight and the contract will be amended to run through 2023.

Unbelievable?  Of course not; it’s totally believable.

Morons.

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Filed under General Idiocy, It's Just Bidness

Today, in people are shit

I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say that life is too short for making bomb threats because a coach chose not to take a job at his alma mater.

The message posted to Twitter referenced by St. Matthews police matched those in pictures of tweets that were making the rounds on social media.

In the tweets, which were posted before noon Wednesday, the user wrote, “If Jeff Brohm doesn’t come, we burn down Trinity,” and “If you see a man running down frankfort with a gas can and wild look in his eye, its me,” among other messages.

It’s unclear if there were other accounts or tweets in question. The account associated with the tweets has since gone private. Attempts to reach the user were unsuccessful Wednesday night.

Wilkerson said Louisville Metro Police are assisting with the investigation and his department would be contacting the FBI to determine whether to pursue federal charges. It was unclear Wednesday night if they had made contact with the person behind the account.

They better be doing more than making contact.

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Filed under Crime and Punishment, General Idiocy

Undefeated

It’s only Tuesday, but I’m pretty sure this is going down as my favorite story of the week.

Arkansas defensive backs Ryan Pulley and Kamren Curl have been suspended and are not expected to play in the Razorbacks’ game at Missouri on Friday.

Pulley and Curl were identified as the Arkansas players who were socializing with members of Mississippi State’s dance team prior to the Razorbacks’ 52-6 loss to the Bulldogs in Starkville, Miss., last Saturday.

According to the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette, Pulley and Curl were seen taking pictures with and talking to female members of the MSU squad prior to warmups.

“They will not be here today or yesterday or any part of this week for unacceptable behavior – actions that are completely unacceptable to anything we’re about,” Arkansas coach Chad Morris said Monday without specifically referencing the event at Mississippi State.

Classic.  Also, a handy excuse for the ass whipping Arky took from Mississippi State.

Asked about the incident following the game, Arkansas senior linebacker Dre Greenlaw said he was not aware of players talking with cheerleaders, but added, “That’s not something I would do. I surely wasn’t doing it.

“Some people have got different focuses. Obviously, you could see this game we weren’t in the right mindset.”

I’m sure suspending two starters in the secondary just in time to face Drew Lock will get your minds right, Dre.

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Filed under Arkansas Is Kind Of A Big Deal, General Idiocy

“This is something that we’re gonna learn from and grow from.”

I gotta tell you, in a day and age where we’re assaulted with the crap from Ohio State and Maryland, it’s almost a relief to read a sweating the small stuff story like this.

All-American defensive tackle Ed Oliver got into a heated discussion with Houston coach Major Applewhite just before halftime of the Cougars’ 48-17 win over Tulane on Thursday night.

Applewhite approached Oliver, who has missed four consecutive games because of an injured knee, on the Houston sideline before halftime and removed the lineman’s jacket from his shoulder. Oliver could then be seen shouting at Applewhite as the team walked toward its locker room at halftime and was restrained by Houston director of sports performance Rod Grace.

Applewhite said after the game that Oliver left the locker room and that he hadn’t spoken to him since, but he emphasized that he wanted the Outland Trophy winner back.

“I love him, I want him to be a part of our team, I want him to be with our team,” Applewhite said. “You’d be amazed how many emotional things you deal with all the time with players. This is just one that you see. But we deal with things like this all the time as coaches. That’s part of our job.”

A pissing match between a star player and his head coach over a jacket?  Now that’s the kind of goofy bullshit that makes me love college football.

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Filed under General Idiocy

When you REALLY want to make sure you get tossed for unsportsmanlike conduct…

Just make sure you leap over an official to throw a punch at an opposing player.

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Filed under General Idiocy

Suppose they gave a shitshow and nobody came…

Here’s something you probably didn’t care to know.

I bet Mickey’s kicking itself for letting them go.

37 Comments

Filed under General Idiocy

This week, on Justified

You may not have heard, but Todd Grantham lost his shit in Nashville. Again.

We all tried to brush this off in 2011 by blaming James Franklin, but at this point, I think it’s best to heed the wisdom of Raylan Givens in such matters.

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Filed under General Idiocy