Category Archives: Nick Saban Rules

Thursday morning buffet

The chafing dishes are tanned, rested and ready.


Filed under College Football, It's Just Bidness, Nick Saban Rules, Phil Steele Makes My Eyes Water, Recruiting, Science Marches Onward, SEC Football

While we were all in the air conditioning…

You go to punishment with the penalties you have, not the penalties you might want or wish to have.

Documents obtained by a television station in Louisiana show that Alabama has already begun disciplining left tackle Cam Robinson and safety Hootie Jones, who were arrested on drug and weapons charges in Louisiana May 17.

According to the documents obtained by KNOE 8 News in Louisiana, coach Nick Saban suspended both players indefinitely May 19.

There’s more.

According to the documents, both players have had to undergo weekly urine tests, have had regular drug counseling, have monthly video appointments with a mental health consultant and have had to meet twice a week with a Tuscaloosa police officer for gun safety/ownership education.

They also both have had to complete 20 hours of community service.

In addition, Robinson has spent at least 26 hours riding along with the Northport Police Department while Jones had to spend 21 days in a drug rehab program, per the documents.

They’re still suspended, but, as the article notes, there’s no word on whether that suspension will extend into any games.  Yeah, I know.  Besides, why punish Nick Saban?


Filed under Crime and Punishment, Nick Saban Rules

Nick Saban locks in the Greg McGarity discount.

Jeremy Pruitt is signed, sealed and delivered… at less than the going rate.

New Alabama defensive coordinator Jeremy Pruitt will save the program a little cash.

Though he’ll be one of the highest paid defensive coordinators in the country, his salary will be considerably less than his predecessor. The deal approved Tuesday will pay Pruitt $1 million a year and spans the next three seasons.

Former Alabama defensive coordinator Kirby Smart made $1.5 million last season as the highest-paid assistant in the nation.

Not just a cut from what Kirby was making, either.  It’s also a cut from what Pruitt was getting paid in Athens last year.  Of course, once you add back in what Georgia still owes him, it’s all good.

Honestly, given the warm feelings between Pruitt and McGarity, I’m surprised he’s making as much as he is in Tuscaloosa.  Thanks, Nick.



Filed under It's Just Bidness, Nick Saban Rules

Second chance in Tuscaloosa narrowly avoided

Nick Saban’s got his starting left tackle back, y’all.

The district attorney in Monroe, La., decided not to pursue prosecution of Cam Robinson and Hootie Jones, KNOE-TV reported. According to documents tweeted by the TV station, insufficient evidence was the reason the case was dropped.

Evidently, finding “… that a bag of marijuana and a handgun were in plain sight and a stolen handgun was found under the passenger seat” wasn’t sufficient.  Go figure.


UPDATE:  Hang on a minute.

The charges were not dropped completely, however. The clerk’s office said the case could proceed in the future if new evidence is presented. But for now, no future court dates are scheduled.

Maybe they’re waiting to spring those the week before the Alabama-LSU game.


UPDATE #2:  Who said prosecutors don’t have a heart?

District Attorney Jerry Jones confirms that the charges against Alabama athletes Cam Robinson and Laurence ‘Hootie’ Jones have been dropped.

Jerry Jones cited insufficient evidence in proving who was in possession of the gun and the drugs, thus, he is dropping the charges.

Jones says, “I want to emphasize once again that the main reason I’m doing this is that I refuse to ruin the lives of two young men who have spent their adolescence and teenage years, working and sweating, while we were all in the air conditioning.”

Good thing Alabama doesn’t play in a domed stadium.  And, yes, I’m thinking “we were all in the air conditioning” is destined for the Lexicon.


Filed under Crime and Punishment, Nick Saban Rules

Quite the career path you’ve chosen, fella.

Well, here’s one you don’t hear every day: a man who once held an equity position in one of Michigan’s largest law firms and was well connected enough to have been considered the favorite in a race for a Congressional seat sued his firm for treating his decision to take a temporary leave of absence to join Alabama’s coaching staff as a withdrawal.  (He lost.)

Best of all, he characterized the move as “a temporary career enhancing opportunity … that could help the firm expand its legal practice”.  Uh huh.  That’s what they all say.

So where is he now?

After owning a stake Michigan’s oldest law firm, Altobelli has been on the Alabama staff in a relatively low-level position since. He was paid a total of $45,318 in 2015, according to University of Alabama payroll records, to be one of eight analysts on the football staff. The title is also held by several young coaching prospects like William Vlachos and Wes Neighbors, both of whom played at Alabama in the last five seasons.

Sounds like his practice has really taken off.


Filed under General Idiocy, Nick Saban Rules

“All of us believe in second chances.”

Good Lord, this is arrogant stuff, especially coming from a school that had an SEC transfer rule named after Saban’s last mistake.

“All coaches think they could save everybody,” Battle said in Destin. “Nick has had great success in taking players in his history. Some of them have really done well. And some haven’t. But probably more than not, he has been able to change behavior. I think that’s part of his DNA.”

Sorry, but the minute you believe your coach’s ability to save kids is part of his DNA is the minute you guarantee you’re going to enroll someone who can’t be saved.  Which means somebody else is going to pay a price for your delusion.


Filed under Nick Saban Rules

Hey, who let that rule in here?

Nick Saban, concerned.

Nick Saban, who contrary to perception does sometimes smile and make a joke, opened an SEC meetings press conference a couple years ago by doing just that.

“It always makes me nervous when there’s no issues,” said Alabama’s football coach. “Because then somebody creates one.”

Kinda like this.  He should know.

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Filed under Nick Saban Rules