Category Archives: Political Wankery

Not funny, man.

When people say the terrorists hate our way of life and our freedoms, this must be what they’re talking about:

Iowa’s three state universities would be prohibited from cooperating with Stanford University until Stanford officials publicly apologize to Iowans for “unsporting behavior” by the school’s marching band during the Jan. 1 Rose Bowl football game under a bill introduced Wednesday in the Iowa Senate.

Stanford’s football team defeated the University of Iowa 45-16 in the game. In addition, the Stanford band, which has a history of irreverent performances, poked fun during the halftime show with a dancing cow, a frowning farmer formation and other tongue-in-cheek gestures that upset some Iowans. ESPN, which televised the game, cut away from the band’s performance.

State Sen. Mark Chelgren, R-Ottumwa, told The Des Moines Register at the Iowa Capitol on Wednesday that he introduced Senate File 2081 because he believes Stanford officials have condoned improper behavior by the marching band.

Jeez, dude, couldn’t you just give a press conference and be done with it?

The details of his bill are a hoot.

The Iowa legislation would prohibit “certain future collaboration and cooperation” between Stanford and the University of Iowa, Iowa State University and the University of Northern Iowa. However, it would permit sporting events between Stanford and the Iowa universities. In addition, collaborations and contracts already in effect would be exempt from the ban.  [Emphasis added.]

So, the academic and research stuff, the reason these institutions purportedly exist, those relationships would be severed… but the games must go on!  At least he’s got his priorities straight.  And I’m sure political ambition has nothing to do with this sincere gesture… oh, wait.

… Chelgren, who is seeking the Republican nomination to run for Congress in a district that includes the University of Iowa.

Not only is he ambitious, but he’s tone deaf, to boot.  Makes you proud to be an American.


Filed under Political Wankery

You don’t stay rich spending your own money.

Sheldon Adelson proposes building a $1.2 billion domed stadium for UNLV football, requiring a mere two-thirds of the cost to be covered through public funding.

Hey, it never hurts to ask, right?

According the 22-page presentation, legislative action would be required to establish a budget and funding formula for the public financing. Lawmakers would need to authorize creation of a Stadium Authority Board to oversee the 42-acre site.

Enabling legislation for a “fee”-based source of public revenue is required for the $780 million in public money.

Putting fee in quote marks is a nice touch.  They’re dumbasses if they agree to it, but being dumb is what makes politics go ’round, so I wouldn’t bet against it.


Filed under It's Just Bidness, Political Wankery

“Where’s my football team? Get over here, football team.”

University of Iowa officials say they are confident no NCAA rules or university policies were violated when members of the University of Iowa football and wrestling teams joined Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump on stage Tuesday night.

That’s a damned shame.  Trump vs. Emmert would have been fun to watch.


Filed under Political Wankery, The NCAA

If you deplore the wussification of football…

… then you need to vote, my fellow Americans.  Because Donald Trump will make football great again.

After talking about Iraq, he segued onto the topic of the NFL, with playoff games on his mind.

“It’s a Sunday, who the hell wants to watch these crummy games? I just want to watch the end. By the way — okay, let me go there for a second. Let me end that story. So we gave them Iraq, we’re stupid. We’re stupid. I’ll change things. Believe me, I’ll change things. And again, we’re going to be so respected. I don’t want to use the word ‘feared.’ What I just said about a game — so I’m watching a game yesterday. What used to be considered a great tackle, a violent head-on [tackle], a violent — if that was done by Dick Butkus, they’d say he’s the greatest player. If that were done by Lawrence Taylor — it was done by Lawrence Taylor and Dick Butkus and Ray Nitschke, right? Ray Nitschke — you used to see these tackles and it was incredible to watch, right?

“Now they tackle. ‘Oh, head-on-head collision, 15 yards.’ The whole game is all screwed up. You say, ‘Wow, what a tackle.’ Bing. Flag. Football has become soft. Football has become soft. Now, I’ll be criticized for that. They’ll say, ‘Oh, isn’t that terrible.’ But football has become soft like our country has become soft. [Applause] It’s true. It’s true. The outcome of games has been changed by what used to be phenomenal, phenomenal stuff. Now these are rough guys, these are rough guys. These guys — what they’re doing is incredible, but I looked at it and I watched yesterday in particular. So many flags, right? So many flags. And I could imagine a guy like Lawrence Taylor and Dick Butkus, who was really rough, and some of these guys sitting there watching. ‘Wow, what a beautiful tackle.’ ‘Fifteen yards! That’s — the game is over.’ You can’t kick a field goal any more.”

When personal fouls are outlawed, only outlaws will have concussions.  Or something.


Filed under Political Wankery, The Body Is A Temple

Hey, legislators are sports fans, too!

When you see the phrase “include a bunch of loopholes” used to describe a recently passed law, you pretty much know what’s coming next.


Filed under Political Wankery

Today, in shameless pandering

Carly Fiorina is a Stanford grad, and, boy, is she excited about the Rose Bowl… er, uh…

With three minutes to go in the third quarter, Stanford leads by five touchdowns.  I imagine Fiorina’s going to do about as well in the Iowa caucuses as the team she’s rooting for tonight.


Filed under Political Wankery

Wednesday morning buffet

A little buffet is good for the soul.

  • It’s been quite a finish at Ole Miss for the Nkemdiches.
  • The Missouri football team boycott really hasn’t sat well with the state legislature.
  • Forbes ranks college football’s most valuable teams in 2015.  Georgia is sixth on the list.
  • What is Georgia’s motivation in the bowl game?
  • Honestly, this should be mandatory.
  • You had to figure with the release of the new Star Wars movie, somebody would talk to Chris Conley about it.
  • Dabo Swinney thinks it’s wrong to pay his players, but evidently doesn’t have a problem with a $55 million complex that will offer sand volleyball courts, laser tag, movie theater, bowling lanes, barber shop and other perks exclusively to them.  Amateurism these days sure is funny.


Filed under Georgia Football, It's Just Bidness, Life After Football, Political Wankery, SEC Football