Shorter King of the Universe: Aggressive drug testing is both morally correct and necessary, but, like me, you should blame the coaches for implementing it.
“Jake’s not a go-out kid, him and Charlie sit and watch Netflix or watch film,” his father said of tight end Charlie Woerner, Jake’s roommate. “In his mind, he’s there to play football and study. He’s not worried about girls, he’s not worried about downtown life. He’s there to play football.” — AB-H, 9/4/17