Envy and jealousy: a fitting epitaph

The ultimate comment on Chizik’s dismissal comes from Ivan Maisel, who absolutely nails it with this paragraph:

The Tigers started out as a team yearning to be mediocre and never improved. In fact, by the end of the season, Auburn set school records for ineptitude. The Tigers lost to their biggest rivals, No. 3 Georgia and No. 2 Alabama, by a combined score of 87-0. An Auburn coach could be forgiven many things, several of them prosecutable, before he could be forgiven those losses.

If you picture that as the preacher’s few choice words as the dirt is being shoveled over the coffin, it really works.


Filed under Envy and Jealousy

17 responses to “Envy and jealousy: a fitting epitaph

  1. Hogbody Spradlin

    Man, that’s cold.


  2. First it was that Cam Newton nail…then the dirt.


  3. Lrgk9

    Got a couple of Aubie Fan Friends – Emailing said excerpt now

    Grin, Chortle, Guffaw


  4. Spike

    Suck it, Auburn! “All in”, Auburn family?


    • Those fine young men from good families did not set out for mediocrity. Now Chizic did not either. He just played by his own rules. You cannot do that in CF. Last person you need to be thinking about is yourself. Like St. Mark.


  5. Boz

    I see the point you were making but it’s hard to leave out the punch line:

    “For going 5-19 with the Cyclones, Chizik was awarded with a head-coaching job in the Southeastern Conference. Given the ups and downs of Chizik’s career, after this 3-9 nightmare, he will be either the next coach of the Dallas Cowboys or the next U.S. Secretary of State. The legion of skeptics, critics and naysayers will be there to see what happens next.”


  6. Slaw Dawg

    This chortling over the sad misfortunes of our SEC rival is unseemly, ladies and gentlemen. Unseemly, I say!


    A-hah. Hah. HAH! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH, choke, gurgle, spit, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, LORDAMIGHTY, WHOOOEEEE JESUS, AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH, isn’t th-there a f-f-footb-b-ball g-game this a wee-eek, OH GOD, OH, A-HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA, th-that we, we should be talkin ab-about…AW SHIT HAHAHAHAHA choke HAHAHA Oh, Momma…

    I’ll g-get back to you l-later….


  7. Spike

    ^^ What slaw dawg said!!


  8. Go Dawgs!

    Gene Chizik was fired for the same reason that Jerry Jones has been unable to field a championship contender in Dallas for the last … what, 1. He was jealous that he wasn’t getting the credit, so he started to monkey around with what his assistants were doing. Don’t forget that Malzahn turned Chris Todd into a serviceable SEC quarterback the year before Cam came to save the day. Those Auburn-Georgia games in 2009 was a tight affair. But Chiz couldn’t stand the fact that he wasn’t the one getting the glory, so he decided he had to step in. Same as Jerry Jones. He fired championship coaches because he wasn’t getting enough of the spotlight. Hubris.


  9. W Cobb Dawg

    That mnc cost aubie a boat load of money. Don’t know how investigation will turn out, but cheatzik was able to insulate himself (so far), and probably has taken steps to keep that aubie compensation flowing after bag man trooper goes down.


  10. Please tell me I’m not the only one to read this line…
    “An Auburn coach could be forgiven many things, several of them prosecutable,…”
    and immediately thought, about Bobby Petrino (who did some things that were potentially prosecutable).


  11. Will Trane

    Coaching and athletics on the plain is a soap opera. Makes one wonder about the education side. But all programs now know the bottom line on Chizik. They just have to pay at least $204,000 per month for the first 3 years of a contract. Just maybe he can follow his previous two predecessor back into coaching.
    Thought it was interesting to look at CMR’s time at UGA compared to the coaching changes at the other schools during his tenure.
    Think CMR highlighted the SEC game around the nose guard, center, and qbs. As did Saban. Plus CMR’s remark about blocking and getting off the block on every play sorta highlighted my concern about those 86-88 defensive plays against Tech. Bama’s QB is a big QB, may not look that way from the stands or the flat screen, and he opreates behind a big, talented O line. They ain’t Tech by any stretch of the imagination.
    Now would it not be a kicker if both the Dawgs and Jackets won. Damn!
    Plus I liked what CMR and Saban said about the recruiting in the state of Georgia. Which brings me back to those little whinny ass high school coaches in the state of Tennessee. Stop whinning and bitching and start coaching and talking with maturity about player development….”and Coach Dooley’s personality and shadow not gracing their offices”….how would the Mad Hatter put it…freaking piss ass coaches.


  12. Bryant Denny

    Why all this excitement over a coaching change at Auburn? Seemed only fair to me to give the guy a few mores to try to turn things around.


  13. Dude I am so stoned I cannot remember what I was gonna say. Did you burn it into the brains of your impressionable children? Loved that.


  14. Lrgk9

    Bottom Line on CheeseStraw:
    “It’s hard to overstate how much missing signees affected Chizik’s last two Auburn teams, especially his last team. Recruiting-service rankings say they were good players, but 35 Chizik-era signees over four years weren’t on the roster this year for various reasons.”