Style over substance

Too bad they can’t find a machine that perfectly form fits their athletes into a ten-win season.


Filed under Auburn's Cast of Thousands, Stylin'

46 responses to “Style over substance

  1. mg4life0331

    They can form fit deez.

    Liked by 9 people

    • RangerRuss

      It’s a major party foul playing that instead of “Travelin Man/Beautiful Loser” from Live Bullet in most instances. However, it’s appropriate in this context. Which once again proves my theory that Auburn sucks.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Illini84

        I liked Seger when he was a kick ass rocker with the Bob Seger System! Bob Seger – Leanin’ On My Dream from Momngrel

        “I was addin’ the score when there’s a knock on the door
        Was a letter addressed to me
        It read “greetings from the president, united states”
        I fell down on my knees
        The next day I was on the picket line
        And Lord you should have heard me scream
        “you know you’re leanin’ on my dream”


      • Down Island Way

        My friend, theory and the barners don’t go together, though your assertion that #AUBURN SUCKS! is true, right down to the ground…#AUBURN SUCKS!


  2. Gotta make sure you’re cutting a svelte figure while you’re farting away a 28–3 lead to Mississippi State.

    Liked by 10 people

  3. practicaldawg

    I don’t care for Auburn or form-fitting clothing

    Liked by 7 people

  4. David D

    TSA, IMO.


  5. Looks more like a screening machine for impermissible benefits, sponsored by Osmose. Like the ice cream machines at McDonalds, it, too, is perpetually broken.

    Liked by 3 people

  6. W Cobb Dawg

    Is ‘form fitting’ another way of saying ‘men in tights’?

    The real question is, how did they get the original Star Trek beaming pad away from gtu?

    Liked by 1 person

  7. D.N. Nation

    Ah yeah, that reminds me, Stetson taking off against the ‘Barn, getting an eject-worthy dirty hit from Smoke Monday, and brushing it off was pretty badass.

    Liked by 4 people

  8. 3rdandGrantham

    Nice drop ceiling complete with fluorescent lights. Reminds me of my middle school classroom back in ’88. They might want to put some of that money towards facilities.

    Oh wait, they are a basketball school now and are putting their resources towards that instead.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Ozam

    Can you put a truck in there?

    Liked by 5 people

  10. Game changer coach, form fitting uniforms, awkward dancing with recruits – can Nick please do something we can make fun of?

    In the meantime, Kirby is out there building relationships and winning.

    Liked by 3 people

  11. SlobberKnocker

    Why the hell do they need 3D images when the player is right there?

    Liked by 1 person

  12. cowetadawg

    And they wonder why there was an income deficit in their program. I mean, is it that hard to measure people?

    Liked by 1 person

  13. At Florida, they call that machine the “Coordinator of Athletic Aesthetics”

    Liked by 13 people

  14. Shouldn’t they be using that money to teach their sophomores how to read?

    Liked by 7 people

  15. Dawg93

    Finally seeing what the transfer portal actually looks like.

    Liked by 19 people

  16. Coach 30 provided that machine. Red light means “not an athlete” but rhe Aubbies don’t know that.

    Liked by 6 people

  17. Illini84

    It’s called Anthropometric Measurement “Anthropometry comes from the word “anthropo” which means human and “metri” which means measure.

    According to Stevenson (1989) and Nurmianto (1991), anthropometry is a collection of numerical data related to the physical characteristics of the human body in terms of size, shape and strength and the application of these data to address design problems.”

    Liked by 3 people

  18. Fake news….this is actually a cloning machine to create more Bo Jackson type players. Unfortunately, it’s not calibrated correctly and it produces Bo Nix caliber players that suck and end up transferring.

    Auburn Sucks!

    Liked by 9 people

  19. akascuba

    Can it teach a running back not to go out of bounds stopping the clock with the game on the line?

    Liked by 4 people

  20. Castleberry

    Would rather see us invest in super-tight, easily tearable jerseys that will just rip off completely on any attempt to hold. #unblockable


  21. uga97

    Does it accept jockstrap returns on those left on the field after the UGA RB jukes?

    Liked by 2 people

  22. MGW

    Most schools just use uniforms that stretch a little.