Category Archives: Auburn’s Cast of Thousands

It’s Tubby Time!

Between Tommy Tuberville returning to the state to weigh a run for governor and Malzahn hiring Al Borges as an analyst, it’s starting to feel like 2004 all over again.

All that’s left for Tubs to do is to name Bobby Lowder finance chairman and put Pat Dye in charge of media relations.

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Filed under Auburn's Cast of Thousands, Tommy Tuberville - Mythical National Champ

Herb Hand is a good dude.

I don’t normally dish out praise for Auburn’s coaches, but today, I’ll make an exception.  And Hand is absolutely right about this:

As sad a life as it probably is…

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Filed under Auburn's Cast of Thousands, Recruiting

This time it’s for real.

I love the way the court system keeps pretending Harvey Updyke gives a shit about repaying his almost $800,000 in restitution fees.  It’s so cute!

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Filed under Auburn's Cast of Thousands, See You In Court, Whoa, oh, Alabama

“Tuesdays with Tuberville”

If I knew for sure that his first piece in the series, about the process of hiring and firing coaches, snarkily called out Bobby Lowder, hells, yeah, I’d subscribe in a heartbeat.

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Filed under Auburn's Cast of Thousands, Tommy Tuberville - Mythical National Champ

You can take the Auburn football out of Bobby Lowder, but you can’t take the Bobby Lowder out of Auburn football.

Just when you think Gawd doesn’t give a rat’s ass about college football, you get this as a confirmation otherwise:

Auburn’s offensive coordinator search, nearing the end of its ninth day, is hinging on a high stakes showdown over power and control between coach Gus Malzahn and those with influence over the program, a source told AL.com.

Malzahn, who enters a pivotal fifth season leading the program, had a short list of candidates to succeed Rhett Lashlee, who left for the same position at UConn on Jan. 11.

That short list included former Baylor offensive coordinator Kendal Briles and Arizona State offensive coordinator Chip Lindsey and North Carolina State offensive coordinator Eliah Drinkwitz, both of who have worked under Malzahn. AuburnSports.com also reported Lindsey and Drinkwitz were among Malzahn’s preferred candidates.

A source indicated those candidates did not receive a favorable reaction from people with influence over the program, who felt Briles, now at Florida Atlantic, lacks experience and Lindsey and Drinkwitz, while familiar with Malzahn’s offense were also too close to him.

A list of preferred candidates was provided to Malzahn by athletic director Jay Jacobs, the source said, which was composed of comparatively more experienced coaches, including the Texas A&M’s Noel Mazzone, who reportedly went from the possible lead candidate to staying in College Station in a matter of hours on Thursday.

Freakin’ awesome.  The only thing missing from that story is somebody insisting Gus hire Art Briles, but who knows?  There’s still time.

Though with Auburn experiencing offensive struggles in 2015 and a 1-3 finish to 2016, the program’s powerbrokers wanting the new hire to offer a different perspective is not irrational either.

With less than 12 days to national signing day, the critical hire could come down to a test of wills.

They want their offensive genius to hire a coordinator with a different perspective.  Please proceed, power brokers.  The last time a head coach at Auburn did that, he wound up with Tony Franklin.  That ended well.

Now where the hell did I put that bag of popcorn?

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UPDATE:  And just like that…

Makes you wonder if somebody dropped that leak in order to get somebody else to back off.

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Filed under Auburn's Cast of Thousands

The Gus Bus is hiring a new driver.

Talk about your late night news dump, this popped up about 10PM yesterday.

Rhett Lashlee is leaving his offensive coordinator position at Auburn to take the same position at the University of Connecticut.

The move was announced officially by the Huskies program on Twitter Wednesday evening after Fox Sports reporter Bruce Fedman originally broke the story minutes before.

A lateral move out of the SEC to a program that’s one of the lesser lights in the FBS?  Wut? Malzahn explains.

“This is a great opportunity for Rhett to implement and run his own offense. I’ve known Rhett for two decades and he’s a man of great character and integrity and this is another step towards his goal to become a head coach. I want to thank Rhett for all of his contributions and his friendship. I want to wish he and his wife Lauren all the best in this new endeavor.”

Yeah, sure.  And before you ask, no, it’s not about money.

According to USA Today’s latest database numbers, Lashlee’s annual salary last season was $601,500 with the possibility of additional bonuses that could go as high as $190,000. According to ESPN.com college football reporter Brett McMurphy, Lashlee is reportedly taking a sizable pay cut in his new position at Connecticut. McMurphy reported Wednesday night that Lashlee has agreed to a three-year deal with an annual salary of $350,000.

A fifty percent pay cut doing the same job at a shittier program is a great opportunity?  Cold translation:  don’t let the door hit you in the ass on your way out, son.

Now I doubt this is something that just came to Malzahn in the middle of the night, so the timing is noteworthy, in that five-star stud quarterback Jarrett Stidham is now safely in the Auburn fold.  What’s the big deal there?  Oh, not much.

Remember, kid, what they always tell you:  you commit to the school, not the coach.  Gus will explain it to you if you don’t understand.

Which brings us to the question who will have the opportunity to get close to Stidham, now that his former flame be gone.  The list of suspects is about what you’d expect, guys like former Auburn quarterback Dameyune Craig, Jake Spavital (who’s looking for a job now), Arizona State’s offensive coordinator, Art Briles… HOLY CRAP GUS MALZAHN MIGHT HIRE ART BRILES.

I mean, what could possibly be wrong with Art Briles?  He’s an offensive genius.

Briles has had a connection with Malzahn dating back years when the two staffs began trading playbook ideas with each other. Both staffs have made trips to each other’s campuses to go over new and innovative ideas with their similar offenses. And that right there is probably where this connection stops making sense. In case you’d forgotten, and I doubt many folks have, an independent review by the Pepper Hamilton law firm found that Baylor football coaches and staff interfered with investigations into sexual assault complaints against players, and even impeded potential criminal proceedings. The firm released a 13-page report on May 26, the same day Briles was immediately suspended before reaching a mutual agreement with the school for his departure about a month later. Briles hasn’t been interviewed for a job in college football since the Pepper Hamilton report was released. It would be a near impossibility for Auburn to explain this hire from a public relations standpoint.

Hey, we’re in the age of Trump.  Nobody has to explain anything anymore.  And you have to admit it would sure make Stidham comfy.

It would be the ultimate Second Chance U move, and if there’s any school more into second chances than Auburn, I’d be hard-pressed to name it.

If Jimmy Sexton manages to pull this off, he’s a wizard.

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UPDATE:  I’m shocked, shocked by the early results in this reader poll.

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UPDATE #2:  “No way on Art,” a high-level source told Auburn Undercover on Thursday.  Thanks for getting everyone’s hopes up.

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Filed under Auburn's Cast of Thousands

Auburn delenda est on the recruiting trail?

MaconDawg makes the argument that if recruiting in the state of Georgia is something of a zero sum game, then what’s good for Kirby Smart is bad for Gus Malzahn.

The commonality among those classes? Auburn’s ability to snatch 4-6 blue chip prospects from the state to the east made the difference between a top 10 signing class and one that would have finished outside the national top 20, and near the bottom of the SEC West. And it’s not as if Auburn has been signing the players Georgia passed on. By my count no more than five of the big time recruits listed above did not also have an offer from the Bulldogs. While Auburn’s recruiting “home base” is arguably lower Alabama, Georgia is a close second. When Auburn has recruited well overall, it has recruited Georgia well.

Which is why Gus Malzahn really needs 2017 to be a one-off on the recruiting trail. Auburn has twenty commits for the class of 2017. Only three are from Georgia, none ranked above three stars.

With the possible exception of Crisp County’s Markaviest Bryant (who’s deciding soon from among UGA, Auburn, and LSU), it doesn’t appear that the Tigers are in the running for any blue chip Georgia players. Tray Bishop had been one of the most highly rated players in the 2017 Tiger class, until he flipped his commitment to UGA.

247 currently ranks Auburn’s class a respectable 8th in the nation, including heralded JUCO QB Jarrett Stidham. But that doesnt really tell the full story. Five of the ten teams ranked directly behind the Plainsmen have sixteen or fewer commits. Some will likely add commits and pass them (USC, Penn State, Washington, and obviously Clemson all have significant momentum). In short, Auburn may be about to finish outside the top 10 in recruiting rankings for the first time in a while.

Obviously one year doth not a trend make, but if Rodney Garner, of all people, can’t make hay in Georgia, it’ll be interesting to see what steps, if any, Auburn can take to offset the talent drain from its eastern neighbor.

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Filed under Auburn's Cast of Thousands, Georgia Football, Recruiting