If Harvey Updyke didn’t exist, we’d have to invent him.

He’s on his fourth lawyer, but we’ll get to that in a minute.

In the meantime, enjoy these tidbits from Harvey’s life:

… Barnes said Updyke is a big Alabama fan, saying Updyke ran on the field in 1970 Bluebonnet Bowl with a box of Tide detergent and toilet paper, signifying “Roll Tide.”

Barnes said he and Updyke attended Alabama’s BCS national championship win over Texas in the Rose Bowl at the end of the 2009 season. He also said two of Updyke’s children are Crimson Tyde Updyke and Bear Bryant Updyke. Barnes said he wanted to name another child Ally Bama Updyke, but her mother wouldn’t let him.

It’s good to see where the woman draws the line.  But seriously, is any of that really that crazed?  I mean, consider it in the context of Tahd Nayshun.

I don’t think so.

Anyway, on to Updyke’s lawyer.  He immediately gets plus marks for announcing his representation on Finebaum’s show.  And judging from this comment, he’s not stupid.

… Threatt acknowledged Updyke said on the radio show last month that he said he poisoned the trees.

“He told the police something different. I don’t know him well enough to know if his belief system is consistent with the truth,” Threatt said.

Threatt said “we’re not going to be put in a situation where we’re going to ask where he is insane.”

Smart man.  Especially since his client is currently living in a car in the woods.  Of course, it’s possible that Updyke’s trying to set up a defense that he can hang around trees without poisoning them.

No doubt there’s more to come.  I wonder if they’ll schedule the trial to avoid conflicts with the football schedule.  After all, you know how we are about that sort of stuff in the South.