TFW you can’t do any better than Dan Mullen

Melt this shit down and inject it directly into my veins:

I have bad news for fans calling for Dan Mullen’s head. All his potential replacements stink.

… Which brings us to Mullen. He is far from Mr. Perfect, as we saw in the Gators’ latest misadventure.

Losing to Kentucky wasn’t the affront to decency a lot of fans think. Mark Stoops has built a respectable program, and I guarantee no visiting team will ever again win 16 straight in Lexington.

That said, Florida had more talent. A well-prepared team doesn’t commit 15 penalties. Daring Dan went ultra-conservative.

He shirked off criticism, noting how the Gators dominated the stat sheet. That showed a lingering lack of self-awareness that should have ended after last year’s “Pack the Swamp” and Missouri meltdowns.

It’s fair for fans to be upset about all that, to question Mullen’s recruiting prowess and wonder if the program is hitting a ceiling. What’s missing with many fans is a sense of perspective. I realize that’s also a Constitutional right, but let’s try to be real for a minute.

UF was an overturned jalopy with its wheels spinning in the air in 2017. Mullen quickly lifted it out of that ditch and built a sleek scoring machine that raced to three consecutive New Year’s Six bowls.

He was widely considered an offensive guru until about 9:23 p.m. last Saturday, when he magically turned into Will Muschamp and certain segments of Gator Nation developed a case of Mullen Madness.

Anybody got a vaccine?

In a rational world, Mullen has earned a healthy dose of tolerance.

Stay rational, Gainesville.  Please.


Filed under Gators, Gators...

57 responses to “TFW you can’t do any better than Dan Mullen

  1. Kinda like the argument of ‘who you gonna get that’s better than Richt?’ until Kirby became available. Here’s to them living in that land for a long, long time. In other words, yes, stay rational Gainesville. Please. #FTMF

    Liked by 11 people

    • biggusrickus

      It definitely has that vibe, though it’s a little worse in this case. At least Richt had those first five years and two near misses for the championship game in ’07 and ’12 on his resume. Mullen has three good but not great years and a 3-2 start to the fourth year. And I’m still baffled by their contention that the program was a shambles when he came in. McElwain had a meltdown in year three, but he’d won two straight division titles before that.

      Liked by 9 people

      • iusedtopostasmikecooley

        Revisionist history. I expect nothing more from them.


      • godawgs1701

        lol thank you for speaking the name of Jim McElwain, I’d kinda forgotten about him and how he decided to fire up his team for the Cocktail Party by inventing fake death threats against them in the media.


    • Geezus

      Could you imagine what it would look like had South Carolina moved quicker/earlier and landed Kirby?!?

      Liked by 1 person

    • charlottedawg

      I was someone who really wanted richt gone but recognized that there was a 50% if not more chance we would hire someone worse. Until about midway through the 2017 I was pretty sure smart was muschamp 2.0 because we’re Georgia so of course we would have botched our coaching hire. The fact is coaching searches are a crap shoot but I also think staying with a guy when its clear his ceiling is lower than what the program and it’s associated resources should be, is a loser’s mentality and thus is worth the risk of moving on.

      That being said, Gators please! Don’t do anything stupid, keep Mullen forever!!! Oh and especially his buddy Grantham the best DC in college football!!!!

      Liked by 9 people

  2. MudCat's Mechanic

    How the turntables. FTMFs

    Liked by 4 people

  3. pantslesspatdye

    Now let’s not lose to them, amirite?

    Liked by 9 people

  4. Ran A

    Oh, I wish I hadn’t read that. The guy took post from other fan bases that included Georgia’s (and in the Dawgs case appeared to be from past years) and used it as examples of other coaches that were not “all that”

    This guy gets paid to write articles… But I’m with the Senator… Listen to this guy – you should keep Mullen – there isn’t anybody out there better that would want the UF job…

    Liked by 3 people

  5. Castleberry

    I mean, two weeks ago he was the second best coach in the conference. Only behind the greatest coach EVAH!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Muttley

      That’s why it hurt so much for them- a real, actual loss coming so soon after his Statement Loss had lifted the whole program to giddy heights and made Florida- well, if not relevant, relevant-adjacent.

      Liked by 7 people

  6. They can hire someone who isn’t a petulant child. Part of Florida’s problem is that when being an asshole is prerequisite from your fans to hold the job, that’s hard to turn off when things aren’t going well.

    There is a reason Stoops never really considered every time it opened up: he was aware of who he would have to satisfy.

    Liked by 3 people

  7. Spell Dawg

    I called them losing to Kentucky or LSU a few weeks ago, but could they lose to BOTH of them?? Just imagine that…be still my beating heart 😀
    Next weekend’s game between the two is setting up nicely. Lace ’em up loose and throwable, Bayou Bengals!

    Read a Mike Biatchi piece this morning warning Sideshow Dan he could lose Richardson if he doesn’t start him. I can’t see them canning Mullen (he’s almost exactly where McElwain was contract-wise ~$12mil to fire now~ it would be costly), but if fan-favorite Richardson DID leave, all bets are off.
    Fall 2022, I love you ❤

    Liked by 3 people

  8. Doggoned

    Coach Meyers might be available for a return to the Swamp.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Did anyone check out the comments thread from that piece?

    IMO we found the next Star. The high academics at UF shortens the list of recruits that want to come here. The work load in the classroom shy’s a lot of kids away because they are not willing to commit to the class work.

    I’ve read a lot of excuses for Mullen being a shitty recruiter, but “Florida’s academic standards are just so high” is definitely a new one.

    Liked by 4 people

  10. Remember the Quincy

    We’ve won 7 in a row in Lexington…only 9 more to go to reach that guarantee the author writes about.

    Liked by 2 people

  11. Geezus

    Daring Dan …. lol.


  12. Bulldawg Bill

    “…can’t do any better than Dan Mullen”
    Why would you want them to do better???


  13. MGW

    If he wants to win he needs to replace most of his staff with competent coaches who are elite recruiters. There’s just no way they go any further than 2020 without a massive talent upgrade, and he’s not that coach. You could scheme around a more talented team a decade ago, but the gulf between the elite talented teams (as far as UF is concerned that’s UGA and Bama) and everyone else is far too wide to do that consistently now. A game every season or two? Sure. Jax (and sometimes LSU), Atl, and two more games beyond that in a row? Absolutely f’n not happening.

    Liked by 1 person

    • ericstrattonrushchairmandamngladtomeetyou

      Mullen’s first three seasons were with MCElwaine’s players. Running out of those after this season. As bad of a recruiter he is I think FU may really be in for a decline starting next year.


  14. Faltering Memory

    Dan, the best coach of what, in what year?

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Corch Irvin Meyers, Former Jags Corch (2024)


    Fuck those motherfuckers!


  16. For every Spurrier or Meyer, there are dozens of Zook’s, McElwain’s, and Muschamp’s out there. The odds of getting another HOF coach back in the saddle at Florida so soon are slim in my opinion.


  17. practicaldawg

    Time heals all Mullen losses. He’s been at this for a long time. They will thrash Vandy and suddenly be a peer to Alabama again.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Got Cowdog

      I took Florida to cover the 28.5(?) because Danno needs to make a statement, and he’s enough of a jerk to run it up on a hapless Vandy to make that statement, which prompts me to say:
      “Forget it, Dan. It’s Vanderbilt.”


      • practicaldawg

        They definitely cover. He matches his energy and prep to the situation each week. Normally they would play down to Vandy, but this is a chance to rekindle the narrative that he rebuilt the 2021 offense to be just as potent as last year–and with less talent to boot.


        • practicaldawg

          I also expect “AR-15” to be back in the spotlight after some big TDs on busted plays where he took off after failing to see his open receivers.


  18. waltergeiger

    urban could use a hold back coach while he is out clubbing.

    Liked by 6 people

  19. RC

    Serious question- has anybody done a comprehensive breakdown of offenses under Mullen as a HC, and their metrics and performance performance against the league? I’m just curious how so many continue to tongue-bathe him over his purported offensive genius.


    • iusedtopostasmikecooley

      I have a feeling you could ask those people for specifics on why they think he is such a stud of an offensive coach and you would just get the same old crap about Miss State and his time at Florida as an OC. Present them with the fact that when he didn’t have Dak Prescott or Time TiVo and Percy Harvey he has been pretty mediocre and they would just stare stupidly.

      Liked by 2 people

    • practicaldawg

      According to this post, Mullen was 7-42 against ranked teams before the 2021 season and 2-28 against the top 10. Those numbers have only deteriorated with the loss to Alabama (and Kentucky if they finish ranked).

      That’s quite a resume and the man probably deserves another raise this offseason.

      Liked by 1 person

  20. uga97

    Mullet is the annointed QB & Xs-Os whisperer, it’s all hes got.

    He’s lost 5 of last 8 games with an NFL 1st rounder & 4th YR Jr. QB.

    He is the only gayturd hc to lose to Kentucky twice, repeat, twice over the last 40 years.

    Now his scapegoat D coordinator is coaching D so he’s finally exposed.

    But as he says, he’s not out-coached, so FU still has their guy.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. W Cobb Dawg

    Nobody out there better.

    I’ll say it again, no HC gets better press than Mullen. It’s as if he writes these stories up while lounging around Lake Oconee and sends the product to the fawning sports media. When he loses 3 more games this year, there will still be positive stories. Shit, maybe even a raise.

    Liked by 2 people

  22. gotthepicture

    Mullen is amazing! I mean, gosh, look at the awesome job he’s done recruiting and winning while both Miami and FSU are on epic trips in the dumpster.
    Seriously, how can people not realize this turd has underachieved by a ton?

    Liked by 1 person

  23. The Mullen Legacy…Greatest Loss(es) Of Our Era – GLOOE

    Liked by 2 people

  24. Munsoning

    UGA is damn fortunate to have Kirby. Would be drinking even more somehow if Mullen were the head ball coach. Good riddance to Florida Man McGarity and any of his toadies who wanted that empty pair of Jordans (dude doesn’t wear a suit, so…) in Athens.

    Liked by 3 people

  25. Kevin’s Missing Pinky

    They are 100% in the Richt-Zone.

    But without the class, honor, and multiple SEC titles.


  26. archiecreek

    Damn Senator,
    I wish the ditch lizards can remain rational and give muLLLet an extension after a thrashing of the sea men.
    However, I have a feeling like I did wishing the north ave. trade school would give paul THE johnson an extension and the East Alabama Reform School would give BOOM! Malzahn an extension. It didn’t happen!
    But, to be honest, I like corch Capris Pants better than THE johnson.
    And I hope I like EARS new corch (don’t know his name, and hope I never have to learn it) better than BOOM! Malzahn!