Why, Miz Scarlett, I nevah!

Tell us you’ve never been in a college football locker room without telling us you’ve never been in a college football locker room.

I feel faint, Miz Scarlett.


Filed under Georgia Football

95 responses to “Why, Miz Scarlett, I nevah!

  1. Hogbody Spradlin

    Oh go piss up a rope!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Kirby to Auburn after 2012 was apparently a done deal until Auburn wouldn’t let him coach in the NC game.

    So yeah, they’re full of shit.

    Liked by 4 people

    • Ran A

      That’s the excuse given – Kirby wanted control of the program and the power brokers at Auburn were not about to let go. They had that problem with Gus and they have that problem now..

      Here’s the thing about Auburn. Their record doesn’t back up the name. They are basically living off of two years. 2010 Natty Year 14-0 and the 2013 year 12-02. And beating Saban 5 of the times they have played him, which will be 5 of 15 in two weeks.

      From 2007 to 2020, they are 115-66. Averaging 8 wins a year and 5 losses. Take those two years out and they are 89-64. That drops them to 7 and 5 (barely – but it takes the 8 from a 7). They have had one 10 year win season since 2014 – one!.

      Point being – this has been a mediocre program for 15 years (counting this year, which interesting enough is tracking to be 6-6 before the bowl game), which is right in line with their average.

      Auburn just might be the most over-rated program in the SEC.

      I don’t care for Auburn…

      Liked by 23 people

  3. HirsuteDawg

    I’m waiting to hear what RR has to say about this.

    Liked by 2 people

    • RangerRuss

      Oh Hairy One, I figure if you look in the Urban Dictionary under stupid fuckn cunt there’ll be a picture of AUShug87. Maybe a little Preparation H cream would soothe her burnt ears and cure the hemorrhoids she gets while shoving her head in and out her ass. That’s how rough Men speak.
      As far as Coach Dooley? He knows me well enough that we’re on a first name basis. He calls me Russ and I call him Coach. I’ve never heard him use that language in casual conversation. Both he and Ms Barbara would be scandalized if a tape such as that became public. However, I have friends that played for him. He’s capable of that and violently worse. Never forget that Coach Dooley is a Marine. He damn sure hasn’t forgot.
      Semper Fi you Jarhead muthafukas.

      Liked by 23 people

  4. Corch Irvin Meyers, Former Jags Corch (2021)

    Tell me you’re a fucking loser without telling me you’re a fucking loser.

    Liked by 7 people

  5. uga97

    Sure, because Harsin’s handling of his Vax status is the gold standard of class.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Down Island Way

      Every one acts surprised when the prettiest little cesspool on the plains decides to rise up and attempt to add a new word in their goat fucking vocabulary, those corn fed inbreads wouldn’t know class if they were chasing cow chips thrown by their second cuzins nephew who is married to their first cuzins sister, only reason they use in door plumbing cause the port-o-let they bought from the pawn shop ran out of toilet paper, dumb fucks threw it all in the trees after they beat ga state, to say their virgin ears got offended by something the UGA football HC said is good enough for me to repeat those same words every chance I get…#AUBURN SUCKS!

      Liked by 3 people

      • sniffer

        Is this, I mean, Old Fashioned Hate Week? I missed a lot.

        Anyway, the disgust and vitriol spewed in the direction of Auburn today is, well, much appreciated. I hate Florida worse but, my gosh, the word art here is priceless. Well stated, one and all.

        Liked by 1 person

      • archiecreek

        That’s a mighty damn fine discourse on the sitch’ation at the east alabama reform school!!
        Mighty damn fine lexiconoabularies there!!


  6. Derek

    Didn’t we have a commentator here say almost the same thing with the same preamble: I know everyone will know I’m wrong but…

    Liked by 3 people

    • Muttley

      Well, I’ll go out on that limb, too. Go ahead and hate me, say what you will, but I’m also glad Kirby Smart is not the head coach at Auburn. There.

      Liked by 9 people

    • That was probably me. But I didn’t go as far to say “no honorable man” talks like that.

      For the record, I worked for 10+ years as a sheet metal worker (“duct man” or “tin knocker”) installing duct systems for commercial and light-industrial HVAC systems. I’m no stranger to profanity and vulgarity. I’ll guarantee everyone who reads this I’m not shocked by it, per se.

      It just makes me roll my eyes. When I think of people who’ve motivated and inspired me it’s usually those who had a more creative vocabulary than “fuck”, “shit”, “bitches”, etc.

      My point isn’t whether Kirby should say the things he says or use certain language. I’m just saying it doesn’t “make me want to run through a brick wall for him”, as many others have said.

      But I realize his comments weren’t meant to inspire me. So it doesn’t really matter. I just wanted to raise my voice as my reaction seemed to be a little different than others….


  7. godawgs1701

    Fuck Auburn.

    Liked by 5 people

  8. I don’t care for Auburn

    Liked by 5 people

  9. owensborodawg

    Oh my goodnes. I’m a pastor, grew up in the church, and all that….. but my grandmother was, hands down, the finest cusser in all of NE Georgia when I was growing up. All those boys who thought themselves cool for throwing out profanity in the bathroom in the 4th grade were truly amateurs. My grandmother was head and shoulders above all of their naive bull****. I just laughed and left the room.

    There is a time and place for all language. I won’t curse in a sermon, unless, of course, we go 15-0, then all f***ing bets are off…..

    Seriously, Kirby was fired up and said what he said IN A FOOTBALL LOCKER ROOM not the Sistine Chapel. Sorry, starting to rant. I’ll stop.

    Liked by 24 people

  10. practicaldawg

    My advice: don’t say shit to their undisciplined asses

    Liked by 10 people

  11. siskey

    Y’all these are people who allow their children to get spit on in Athens, attend mega-churches, and drive Acuras. I know why they are offended.

    Liked by 4 people

  12. jsun7

    Nothing had ever made me smirk more than message board posters accusing others of having no class. It’s the best.

    Liked by 4 people

  13. Mary Columbia Cty Office

    I’m sure Coach Pat Dye never spoke a bad word in his life in the Auburn locker room. I knew Coach Dye, and he cussed like a sailor.

    Liked by 5 people

    • originaluglydawg

      “he cussed like a sailor”
      There was a sign in the medical facility in boot camp (NRTC San Diego 1968) that read, in bold lettering,
      “US Navy Regulations Prohibit the Use of Profanity”

      Liked by 2 people

      • siskey

        At Parris Island when you get your Drill Instructors the Saturday after you arrive they have this ceremony in each Squad Bay where the Company Commander and the D.I.s take some oath that is basically I will uphold the standards of my profession and will not abuse harm, curse, blah blah blah the recruits under my care. When this is over the Senior Drill Instructor says something to the effect of “Drill Instructors, you got em!” This entire ceremony takes approximately 5 minutes because the Company Commander has to do this up to 6 times that same morning. Roughly ten seconds after the Drill Instructors take over my “Heavy” (Who is basically the D.I. that does everything- drill, discipline, etc.) screams at me “What the fuck are you smiling at you Fat piece of shit!?” Fucking good times.

        Liked by 4 people

        • Illini84

          This was my squad leader in Korea. Sgt Branch took no shit.

          Liked by 4 people

        • iusedtopostasmikecooley

          Yeah 6/12/2000 was the day I arrived at Paris Island. We had this one drill instructor who was 5’9” and weighed 150lbs. I know that because he once told us what he wanted us to do and told us that when he gave us the command of execution we had better move like Satan was after because he was and he described Satan’s height and weight. He was from Alabama. He sounded just like Stone Cold Steve Austin when he spoke. He gave a lot of attention to the big recruit from Georgia, yours truly. He was mean as cat shit and that cussing Kirby did was nothing compared to what this guy did on the regular. I wish I could track him down. When we ate our Warrior’s Breakfast at the end and the drill instructors sat down and ate with us and talked to us like Marines, he sat my table. He was one bad son of a bitch and I wanted to be just like him. Too many soft ass people that think they’re tough anymore.

          Liked by 3 people

          • RangerRuss

            If you spent some time in the military most likely you had a moment while being graded or counselled when you wanted to be anywhere but there. SSG Bronson is the one I remember. He looked like he had been hired by Hollywood central casting for the part. He never raised his voice and I don’t think he cursed once. When he finished grading my patrol, and I passed and moved on to the Mountain Phase of Ranger School, I didn’t know whether to piss or puke. That was the most effective tirade I experienced anywhere and I spent the remaining years of my career seeking to emulate that style. He was there to shake my hand when I graduated. He didn’t smile then and I never forgot what he said to me.
            Yeah, he shook me up. A little bit.

            Liked by 3 people

          • siskey

            My guy was SSgt Rendon a skinny Mexican Air Winger from California. He was tough as hell and very thorough. He taught me just about everything I needed to be a good Marine.

            Liked by 2 people

  14. poetdawg

    I wonder how many 4 and 5 stars Auburn has turned down because they liked to listen to rap at 1,000 decibels in the locker room; Kirby’s rant was tame compared to rap lyrics.

    Liked by 3 people

  15. Dylan Dreyer's Booty

    Jeff Schulz had a good comment about this:

    “…. did you really believe football coaches run up to their offensive linemen at halftime and say: “Live in the sunshine. Swim in the sea. Drink the wild air”? Because they would all look at one another and say, “Coach, we only got Gatorade.”

    Liked by 3 people

  16. If you asked me “Which SEC fan base do you think would be most likely to hit the fainting couch over Kirby’s halftime speech,” I would’ve answered Auburn before you even finished the sentence. A more self-righteous group of church biddies can scarcely be found in this or any other conference.

    Liked by 5 people

  17. Russ

    I think this is hilarious. I’m reading a book on baseball scouting (“Dollar Sign on the Muscle”) and one scout told a story about a prospect that apparently didn’t realize baseball players and coaches cursed. He lasted about 2 weeks in the minors before going home.

    Liked by 4 people

    • siskey

      Thanks for the recommendation. I bought the book on Amazon. While I am a Braves and baseball fan I find myself reading more books about baseball than I watch baseball games outside of the first few months of the season. Go Dawgs!

      Liked by 2 people

      • Russ

        I learned about the book from an interview with Alex Anthopolous a couple of months ago. He said an old scout recommended it to him and he always kept a copy around. It’s a good read.

        Liked by 1 person

  18. fisheriesdawg

    I wonder how this guy feels about having guys in the locker room who steal electronics and take things from their teammates.
    I’d be interested to know who he voted for as President the last two cycles. You know, locker room talk and all that…

    Liked by 5 people

  19. spur21

    I have been told the use of profanity shows a lack of command of the English language and limited vocabulary – I don’t give a fuck what I’m told.

    Liked by 5 people

  20. Muttley

    Really, it all worked out just fine. Our HC has not just beaten them, but really ripped them multiple new assholes for five straight years, I mean really beaten the tigershit out of them, and their HC hasn’t said any bad words. They’re happy, I’m happy.

    Liked by 8 people

  21. originaluglydawg

    ” War Darn Eagle”?

    Liked by 15 people

  22. cowetadawg

    Myopic. Dawg Nation loves Kirby’s rant because it is 100% passion, baby. Faint over the choice of words, we don’t fucking care. Kirby’s leading his men into battle, not debating high philosophy.

    Liked by 5 people

  23. sniffer

    Like “Boom, MFer!” never swore on their sideline..

    Liked by 6 people

  24. 81Dog

    I think that for tomorrow, Kirby should leak a halftime recitation of selected passages from Walt Whitman’s “Leaves of Grass.” Or, perhaps, Sidney Lanier’s “The Marshes of Glynn.” You know, class it up a little. But maybe still punctuate it with F-bombs, because why wouldnt you?

    Liked by 3 people

  25. back9k9

    AU applaudes (and build a statue for) the laptop thief with the $180k pricetag but draw the line at bad words in the locker room?
    Auburn, keep being Auburn!

    Liked by 3 people

  26. iusedtopostasmikecooley

    I’m about to turn forty four and all my life I’ve waited for a coach like the one we have now. Nobody calls us soft or enjoys playing us. The Old Ball Sack once said, “If they like ya they’re probably beatin ya.”

    Liked by 5 people

  27. Bulldawg Bill

    Remember, Folks,
    “Profanity is the crutch of inarticulate motherfuckers!!”

    Liked by 1 person

  28. Illini84

    Kirby’s wife was on 960 for an hour this morning. She loved it and his kids loved it too!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  29. ApalachDawg aux Bruxelles

    once again, he wasn’t at sunday school or a confirmation class, he was in a damn locker room.


  30. NotMyCrossToBear

    I’m sure it has already been said, but that dude can go fuck himself. Now I feel better.

    Liked by 2 people

  31. I wonder if he’ll be saying this after we win ~4 natties in the next 10 years.

    Liked by 1 person

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