We’ll always have Ted Roof.

Instead of blaming South Carolina’s failure this season to defend its East title on Georgia’s schedule, maybe one day ‘Cock fans will point instead to their team’s mystifying inability to hang more than 13 points (at home, with Marcus Lattimore!) on the worst defense in Auburn history.

Then again, nobody does self-delusion better than the South Carolina faithful do.

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UPDATE:  Man, if Chris Low is right about this – Georgia drops Alabama, keeps Ole Miss and South Carolina gets both Arkansas and LSU from the West – ‘Cock fans are gonna go ballistic.

Musical palate cleanser: getting you in the Xmas mood

Ladies and gentlemen, the soulful stylings of Porky Pig:

I defy you to keep that out of your head the rest of the day.

It’s Mark Emmert’s world, student-athletes. You’re just living in it.

If you think that Mark Emmert’s magic is made up of equal parts of arrogance, self-righteousness and selfishness, this article about revenue generated by collegiate apparel sales won’t do anything to dispel your belief.

First, the arrogance.

… Although Robinson’s name is not on the back of the jersey, it’s clear fans are buying it because he’s the most marketable player on the team. Yet Robinson sees no money from those sales, as NCAA president Mark Emmert says it should be.

“They didn’t come to college because there was financial gain involved,” Emmert told CNBC. “They came because they wanted to come to school and to participate in sports. If they choose to become pros after that, that’s all well and good, but this is not about creating new opportunities for them to monetize their position.”

How does he know what’s on the mind of every college kid?  We live in an age when plenty of colleges sell their abilities to prepare players for the NFL and NBA to recruits.  Does Emmert have a clue why that sort of sales pitch might be appealing?  Hint: financial gain is involved.

Besides that, I’d love to hear how Emmert squares this no expectation of financial gain argument with his $2000 stipend proposal.

Then there’s the self-righteousness.

… Not only do high profile players not make a dime off their jersey sales, they also can’t sell the jerseys that they wear. Five Ohio State players got suspended for five games this year for selling their memorabilia.

Yet the school can sell their gear and make the money off it. Auburn sold the pants worn by Cam Newton in the title game for $1,500, while Michigan sold the pants worn by Denard Robinson in this year’s night game against Notre Dame for $1,300.

Emmert says schools can do that because of where the money is going.

“If a school is selling jerseys or memorabilia, then we need to know, are they taking those resources and putting them back into support for student-athletes and athletic programs?” Emmert said. “In every case that I know, those revenues go to support the student-athlete.”

Their hearts are pure!  Besides, everybody knows if those revenues flow directly to the student-athlete (by the way, how is that not support?), he’ll just waste it on hip-hop music and tattoos.

Oh, and let’s not forget the selfish part.

… Emmert admits that part of the reason why he believes athletes will never get paid for their jersey sales or memorabilia while they are eligible is that it’s way too complex.

“We have a similar situation where schools compete for each other around athletes,” Emmert said. “We have agents competing over who’s going to get a student-athlete. You immediately open the door for all those forces coming in and structuring a force model to try and curry favor with the student-athlete. If on the other hand, an institution generates a stream of revenue that allows it to continue running an athletic program, you’ve got a completely different model where revenues are going and what they’re being used for.”

In other words, it’s okay to curry favor with the NCAA and its members.  Just don’t be trying any of that “force model” shit around the players.  Whatever in the hell a “force model” is, anyway.  I doubt Emmert could explain it beyond saying it belongs to him and he’s not sharing.  That’s about as complex as he cares to get.

It’s not like this garbage is going to lead to an “Occupy NCAA” moment.  It’s just that Emmert would deserve it if it ever did.

Maybe you should have thought about it before you let those two in.

It seems to me that the longer it takes for the SEC to get its act together compiling the 2012 conference schedule, the more compelling a nine-game conference schedule is going to look.  There are only so many tradeoffs those guys are going to be able to stomach.

 

Kiffin watch: Having a great time, Vol fans. Wish you were here.

With Matt Barkley’s announcement that he intends to return for his senior year, Southern Cal, which returns a bunch of starters from this year’s 10-win group, inserts itself into the 2012 national title hunt, despite dealing with the effects of crippling NCAA sanctions.

Meanwhile, Tennessee, dealing with the crippling effect of having had Mike Hamilton as an athletic director, is simply hoping to become bowl eligible again.

Junior continues to be the knife twisting slowly into the soul of every Vol fan.

This is what happens when fans are smarter shoppers than their schools are.

The secondary ticket market for bowl games means that people will still show up.  They’ll just be more prudent about it.

But while Tech has sold only about 10,000 of its 17,500 allotted tickets, athletics director Jim Weaver has steadfastly maintained there will be 15,000-20,000 Hokies fans at the Sugar Bowl.

After 19 consecutive trips to bowls, he said, Tech fans are savvy about acquiring tickets. And they can get cheaper seats, often with better views, by going through the secondary market and brokers.

The downside is that some schools will be stuck with an even worse deal from their bowl ticket allotments.

West Virginia’s sports marketing director, Matt Wells, said this week that the school has sold only about 7,500 of its Orange Bowl allotment of 17,500 tickets. While WVU will use another 1,500 tickets for staff and family members, the band and other school-related travelers, Wells said he does not expect the university to sell many more before the bowl against Clemson. That means WVU probably will be on the hook for more than $1 million in unsold ducats.

“We were hopeful that we’d sell more, so we are disappointed with the number of sales,” Wells said.

The bowls aren’t going to change their ways.  Which means schools are either going to have to provide additional incentives to entice their fans to buy through them or continue to eat the increasing expense and look for ways to pass that on to the fan base.  I’m pretty sure we know how that’ll work out.